A Follower of Francis

Franciscan meeting: Growth

2012-02-10T22:03:00.003-05:00

Tonight, two people began formation, and we had a visitor, a Catholic revert, who seems interested in continuing.

Alleluia.

It is good to see new growth or potential growth in the group. I believe that in these troubled times we need the prayers of groups like my little Franciscan Fraternity to help our nation and out world.

Pax et bonum

Obama vs. Catholics

2012-02-05T10:38:00.004-05:00

Back in 2008, I warned my fellow Catholics about Barack Obama's positions on abortion, embryonic stem cell research, and other moral issues. Given his track record, there was little doubt about what he was going to do - except on the part of some Catholics co-opted and deluded by Obama and his promises.

At the time, I said I can't imagine how any Catholic could in good conscience vote for him.

Sadly, the majority of Catholics who voted did vote for him.

We have in the three years since he took office seen him implement more and more of the Culture of Death. This HHS mandate is just the latest - and it won't be the last. I'm optimistic that when the HHS decision gets into the courts it will ultimately be ruled unconstitutional. But it will take a fight, and there will likely be other rulings by this administration that will challenge people of conscience.

As for this fall, I repeat my 2008 observation even more emphatically: I can't see how any Catholic can vote for him this year. But there will be Catholics who are not paying attention, who don't care, who are Catholic in name only who will still vote for him.

Hopefully, this latest move - and the resulting backlash - will open enough Catholic voters' eyes that he will lose the Catholic vote and the election. (Keeping in mind that I'm not a fan of the man who appears on track to be the Republican nominee, Mitt Romney.)

Or maybe the reaction will open Obama's eyes enough that he will repent and change his policies.

Pax et bonum

Gandhi's Seven Deadly Social Sins

2012-02-04T09:10:00.002-05:00

Should he be considered an honorary Franciscan?

Pax et bonum

Fraternity Tonight!

2012-01-27T18:11:00.002-05:00

Due to Christmas and bad weather, my fraternity hasn't met since early December. We meet tonight.

I've missed being with my fellow Franciscans, for the community, and for the prayers and study that we do. I've been professed for six months now, and it still seems so fresh and exciting.

Honeymoon? I hope it never ends.

Pax et bonum

A change in the Secular Franciscans

2012-01-26T05:56:00.002-05:00

I just got word that along with recent changes in the Mass to conform with the Latin original, the same thing is happening with the acronym for the Secular Franciscan Order. Going back to the official Latin name of the order - Ordo Franciscanus Saecularis, we should use the acronym OFS after our names, not the SFO we had been using.

Here's the official statment:

THE OFFICIAL NAME OF THE ORDER
THE USE AND THE TRANSLATION OF THE NAME OF THE ORDER

1. The official name of the Order is Ordo Franciscanus Sæcularis.

2. Translations of the name of the Order

2.1. The translation of the name of the Order is already made in the four official languages, and these are the ones to be used in these languages, namely in Italian, in English, in Spanish and in French.

2.2. The name can be translated into local languages only when the literal translation from Latin is easily understandable even by the civil society and does not change its meaning or substance.

2.3. When the translation into the national language distorts the meaning of the name, or is linguistically impossible to transfer the genuine meaning, Ordo Franciscanus Sæcularis must always be used, which can be followed by expressions to clarify and make more understandable the nature of the Secular Franciscan Order to everyone in the local language.

3. The acronym

The acronym which refers to the name Ordo Franciscanus Sæcularis is OFS and is always to be used regardless of the language. For example, when Secular Franciscans use the acronym after their name, they must use “OFS”.

Encarnación del Pozo, OFS
General Minister

(Good thing I didn't order those new checks yet!)

Pax et bonum

at Planned Parenthood

2012-01-22T10:43:00.003-05:00

at Planned Parenthood

a sign for people they strive

to eliminate

While praying outside Planned Parenthood yesterday, I witnessed somthing happen twice that got me thinking.

A woman drove into the small parking lot and pulled into a spot reserved for those with some handicap or disability. She immediately backed out of the spot and went to another, more distant parking area that serves the building housing Planned Parenthood. She then walked into Planned Parenthood's office.

A few moments later, the exact same thing happened again.

It occurred to me that those two women - I don't know if they were staff, volunteers, or victims of Planned Parenthood - were so scrupulous about heeding the parking laws when it comes to those with disabilities and handicaps, yet they were going into the office of an organization that supports the right of women to abort babies who show any indications they might have some handicap or disability.

I've read recently, for example, of the sudden decrease in the number of children with Down Syndrome being born. When genetic testing indicates the babies have this condition, they are being aborted. For how many other conditions is this happening?

There will always be people who because of age or accident will require such reserved parking spots. But many other people who could make use of them will simply not be allowed to be born.

And how long before Planned Parenthood begins to support the elimination of even those other individuals for the good and purity of society?

Pax et bonum

With Chesterton You Get Egg Rolls?

2012-01-16T14:00:00.003-05:00

Chesterton and Chinese buffets may seem to have no connections, but one occurred to me this morning.

I was reading a recently published collection of the best Chesterton essays when the food at a local Chinese restaurant popped into my head.

It's not that I was suddenly hungry for some Chinese food.

Nor was I thinking about Chesterton's dining habits. I have doubts that Chesterton ever ate what we think of as Chinese food - though I don't know that for certain. Maybe he did enjoy an egg roll or some chow mein at some point.

The restaurant in question seems to do most of its business through its buffet. It has four rows of various Chinese and non-Chinese foods - unless the Chinese invented pizza - with heated pans and heat lights. Most diners just grab plates and wander up and down the rows taking a little bit of this and a little bit of that, though there are always some individuals who grab a lot of this and a lot of that until their plates are piled so high one wonders how much of the food will actually make it to their tables.

Being a habitual observer, during one visit to the restaurant I began to reflect on differing styles of enjoying a buffet of this sort. I saw some people who would go to one row, fill their plates from that row only, and then head back to their seats to eat. When they finished their first plate they would then go back and load up from the second row, and so on, in order until they had visited each row. Did some of them methodically take a little bit of everything? Perhaps.

Then there are those who circulated among the rows, taking this from this row and that from that row. When they went back, they continued the pattern. Perhaps they had favorites and only ate those foods. Perhaps they were afraid to try new things. Or perhaps they were like me, vegetarians who avoid meat dishes.

Recalling this restaurant got me to musing about reading styles when approaching collections of any sort.

There are some people who seem to enjoy by sampling pieces in various sections of a collection. Perhaps they seek out particular topics or writers, or maybe they just trust to luck and read whatever they come to that captures their interest.

There are some collections that lend themselves to this sort of sampling.

Then there are those people who methodically work their way through the collection from preface to index.

There are some collections that lend themselves to this approach.

Both methods have their pluses and minuses.

The sampling method ensures that one will enjoy what one reads for such readers tend to gravitate toward those things for which they already have an interest.

But in doing so, such readers might miss out on gems that just didn't happen to catch their attention.

The methodical readers take in everything the collection contains, good and bad, and thus might have a complete understanding of the organizing principle behind the collection, and along the way perhaps discover unknown treasures and nuggets of information they might otherwise never have encountered.

On the other hand, they might also run into a patch of less interesting pieces that might lead them to stop reading.

When it comes to Chesterton, either approach is acceptable. You can just plunge in and sample as the spirit moves you. Or you can work your way through from beginning to end, knowing that because it is Chesterton there won't be any less interesting pieces to get you questioning whether or not to go on.

When it comes to the restaurant - and many collections - I tend to be a sampler.

With this collection of Chesterton, I'm going the cover-to-cover route.

Either way works well when accompanied by a nice cup of tea.

Pax et bonum

Reading - Hopkins and Dickens

2012-01-14T14:10:00.003-05:00

Amid all the school work - and the sickness that now has me on antibiotics - I did manage to squeeze in some good reading.

First up was Exiles, by Ron Hansen, and interesting account of Fr. Gerard Manley Hopkins and the five nuns that became the inspiration for his poem, "The Wreck of the Deutschland." I've always enjoyed historical "fiction," and this gave me some insights into his life. Good read.

I also just finished (while sitting in the doctor's waiting room) The Man Who Invented Christmas, by Les Standiford. It's an account of Dickens' writing A Christmas Carol, and the effects it had on his career and how the book helped to revive the celebration of Christmas. Also a good read - especially for fans of Dickens and Christmas (like me).

Two thumbs up.

Now, more Chesterton essays.

Pax et bonum

Dueling Bagpipes! (Wait for it...)

2012-01-14T10:44:00.000-05:00

Pax et bonum

Yech

2012-01-14T09:30:00.004-05:00

I've got one of those colds that descended into the lungs. Cough. Cough. Gurgle. Hmm. Maybe a visit to the doctor is in order.

I regretfully decided that going to Planned Parenthood in today's snow and cold is not wise. I'll say a rosary at home instead.

Plus, Rock of Faith is providing the music for Mass tomorrow - so that means set-up tonight. And playing tomorrow.

Oh, and I have to finish grading two sets of papers and preparing two midterm exams.

Then there are those student journals sitting on my desk at school, and the school newspaper waiting a final proofread before going to the printer.

Not a good time to get sick!

Pax et bonum

Justice and Peace

2012-01-01T12:29:00.005-05:00

Today is the Solemnity of Mary, Mother of God. It is also the World Day of Justice and Peace.

In his message for this day, Pope Benedict speaks directly to young people and to the need for justice. Indeed, justice is needed to produce true peace. But, he onbserves, our world too often fails to understand justice.

"In this world of ours, "Pope Benedict write, "in which, despite the profession of good intentions, the value of the person, of human dignity and human rights is seriously threatened by the widespread tendency to have recourse exclusively to the criteria of utility, profit and material possessions, it is important not to detach the concept of justice from its transcendent roots. Justice, indeed, is not simply a human convention, since what is just is ultimately determined not by positive law, but by the profound identity of the human being. It is the integral vision of man that saves us from falling into a contractual conception of justice and enables us to locate justice within the horizon of solidarity and love.

"We cannot ignore the fact that some currents of modern culture, built upon rationalist and individualist economic principles, have cut off the concept of justice from its transcendent roots, detaching it from charity and solidarity: "The ‘earthly city’ is promoted not merely by relationships of rights and duties, but to an even greater and more fundamental extent by relationships of gratuitousness, mercy and communion. Charity always manifests God’s love in human relationships as well, it gives theological and salvific value to all commitment for justice in the world."

"Peace, however, is not merely a gift to be received: it is also a task to be undertaken," he observes. "In order to be true peacemakers, we must educate ourselves in compassion, solidarity, working together, fraternity, in being active within the community and concerned to raise awareness about national and international issues and the importance of seeking adequate mechanisms for the redistribution of wealth, the promotion of growth, cooperation for development and conflict resolution."

Amen.

There's much more. Got to Zenit for the full text.

Pax et bonum

This Blog is Evolving

2011-12-31T11:12:00.005-05:00

When I began this blog, I was looking at it as a way to record my journey as a Secular Franciscan in formation. As of July 9, 2011, I've been a professed Secular Franciscan.

Alleluia.

I used to have another personal blog, an older one that was often political in nature, and, to be honest, sometimes argumentative and less than charitable. I toned it down as I grew in my Franciscan vocation, but, as noted in other posts, I easily fall into the argumentative mode.

There's nothing wrong with discussing and debating issues. Indeed, many of those issues need to be addressed and confronted. But they have to be dealt with in a loving way more in keeping with my Franciscan vocation.

I closed that old blog due to a new job in which I have a very public face (after consulting with my new supervisor).

I kept this and a couple of other group blogs open (with permission). But I also distanced myself in several ways, changing the "name" that appears on my posts.

I've been thinking about some of the issues I've addressed in the past. Abortion. The Death Penalty. Unjust War. Social and Economic Justice. The Arts, and the Role of the Christian Artist. Church Practices. Morality. These topics still need to be addressed. So I've decided to begin to do so in this blog. But I will attempt to do so in a Franciscan style - raising issues, but always with love and charity. That means avoiding the sarcasm, the snide comments, the arrogant mocking tone to which I've been prone in the past.

I will sometimes fall short. But I hope that the Holy Spirit and Father Francis will provide frequent reminders to get me back on track.

Pax et bonum

More Books!

2011-12-31T07:26:00.003-05:00

Once again, relatives and friends gifted me with books this Christmas.

The kind of gifts I always appreciate.

Some of the books are ones I've indicated in not always subtle ways that I want. This year, for example there was one particular book that I really wanted. When a catalog from a well-known Catholic publisher arrived, I searched through it until I found the title, folded the catalog open to the right page, circled the book several times, and sang some Christmas carols with an earnest smile.

I got that book.

Other times people give me books based upon my particular interests. St. Francis of Assisi (of course), Chesterton, poetry, and Dickens are among the interests addressed this year.

Some people knowing my quirky sense of humor give me books they think I will find amusing. This year, a relative who moved to Utah, a state that, to be honest, has never been of the slightest interest to me, although I do like Marie Osmond's version of a Hugo Ball Dada poem, sent me a book about Utah curiosities. I've already discovered one story in it about a woman who uses cow pies - yes, those "pies" - to make clocks, and picture and mirror frames.

A keeper.

The books end up either next to my bed in the pile of books to be read, or outside the "reading room."

This year's additions:

The Road to Assisi: The Essential Biography of St. Francis by Paul Sabatier. Chesterton's biography is the essential one, in my opinion, but this modern examination of his life looks like it has much to offer. It's also a book I'd indicated interest in. Someone was listening.

In Defense of Sanity: The Best Essays of G. K. Chesterton. Circles and Christmas Carols do work.

Surpassing Pleasure by John Slater. A contemporary Cistercian poet: I can't wait to test those verbal waters.

Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats by T. S. Eliot. I'd actually read many of these poems long ago and enjoyed them, so it's wonderful to have them before me again. Plus, it's nice to be reminded that Eliot didn't always write as if he had spiritual heartburn.

How to Do Everything (From the Man Who Should Know) by Red Green. Red Green is a Canadian comedian who is an acquired taste, and a taste that I acquired long ago.

The Man Who Invented Christmas by Les Standiford. A book that examines how Dickens helped to save Christmas from those who would downplay the celebration of it, and, in the process, apparently saved his own career. I've always loved Dickens and his Christmas tales, so this should be an intriguing read.

Utah Curiosities by Brandon Griggs. Cow pies. Need I say more?

Much reading to do.

Of course, in keeping with my policy - I have far too many books - that means weeding out 14 books from my current horde. Hmmm.

Pax et bonum

Grumbling

2011-12-29T20:10:00.003-05:00

One of my many faults is that I tend to be argumentative. I have been known to pick fights, and to bait others. When I argue, I sometimes use sarcasm and harsh words. I tend not to let go once I've started, dragging online debates over several days, and wasting time when I should be focused on family, or or, or prayer, dwelling on my next "incisive" point.

And grumbling about something my "foe" said or wrote.

This was brought home to me again recently through Facebook.

One of my "Friends" (i.e. I know him, but we've never really been close) - is quite literally a Friend - a Quaker. He is also married to a Catholic, attended Catholic schools, and even worked for Catholic organizations, so he has some insight into the faith and, sadly, its flaws.

Alas, he likes to point out those flaws, and the issues with which he disagrees (women's ordination and so-called same-sex marriage, for example. He also has Friends who are even harsher in their attacks on the Church.

I've been caught up on occasion in arguing about some of the points he and others raise.

He said a couple of things recently that bothered me. I briefly responded, and he responded to my response at length. I knew if I continued I would have to similarly respond at length.

But the other morning I found myself dwelling on what I would write - while at Mass. Once again arguing was getting in the way of focusing on God's great sacrificial gift, something that's happened to me too often.

I resolved not to get caught up in yet another argument in which, given my track record, I was likely to be less than Franciscan (or Christian) in my words and thoughts.

I "unfriended" him. Not out of anger, but out of awareness of my own tendencies and sinfulness.

Beyond my own proclivities, this is a danger to which I think many of us who surf the Internet can fall prey. It's too easy to say things through a keyboard that we might never say to the person's face.

It's too easy to label someone a foe, and to forget he is a brother.

And that he is Christ.

Pax et bonum

Santa has a dream

2011-12-26T06:47:00.003-05:00

This past season at the mall - and out - has been an interesting one.

This season I was able to be natural-bearded for the first time.

A young couple became engaged, with the young lady sitting on Santa's lap at the time.

A family with a sense of humor a staged a "protest" - with Santa joining in. (Above)

I was able to help at the Veteran's Outreach Center Christmas Party. And this Wednesday I'll be stopping by a group home for a post-Christmas visit (Santa works up until the Feast of the Epiphany!).

I was featured on the front page of a local paper.

It got me to thinking about the future.

Might it be possible to contact some local advertisers and get some work with them? After all, I can be a natural-bearded Santa for them now. They will be doing their ads in the summer and fall - - before the mall season - and in the summer I'll be off school, so it might be possible to pick up some work. I was asked if I do private parties. Not yet, but could I? More income.

I was also thinking that I should try next season to expand my volunteering. Perhaps the local health/neighborhood centers run by the Sisters of Mercy or the Sisters of St. Joseph to give folks in the city a chance for some visits and photos with Santa without traveling out to the malls or spending lots of money?

Given the local market, it's probably unlikely I could generate enough income to quit my day job for many years yet, but this could be my retirement job. I figure, God willing and my knees holding up, I could do this for about 20 more years, including ten after I can retire. Maybe even longer?

And if I can generate contacts outside the immediate area, maybe I can go at it more full-time sooner?

And what if I used my writing to generate more Santa tales and so sell those? Hmm.

It's a dream. But it's a nice one.

Pax et bonum

Merry Christmas indeed

2011-12-25T12:19:00.003-05:00

The last few days have been joyful ones.

Friday night we went to a family Mass in a barn! It's an annual Christmas tradition on a farm near here, and a fellow teacher who's been involved for years invited me and my bride.

The barn was not heated - coats, hats, and gloves were the order of the day. There were two sheep in the barn who occasionally joined the singing, and a horse. The cows were just outside the door. The Christmas music was folksy - guitars and and a mandolin. The priest joined the musicians for a bluegrass/folk jam after the Mass.

It was wonderful. Maybe a new Christmas tradition for me.

Christmas Eve Day I did 8 hours as Santa's helper at the Mall, for the first time natural-bearded. A steady stream of people. It went smoothly and except for a slight discomfort from sitting for so long, enjoyable. I also found out that an interview I did with a local paper did get published and there I was on the front page with a large picture of me in costume talking to two children. Nice.

Last night, I was semi-awake for once and had a pleasant meal with bride, one daughter, and dad- and brother-in-law.

This morning, Christmas Day!, I was up three hours ahead of everyone else - typical of this early riser - and had some time for reading and thinking. Then opening some gifts, which included much Franciscan and Chestertonian. Ah.

Mass was joyful, and the cantor was wonderful. Her singing raised my spirits even more.

In laws return this afternoon, as will daughter 2. The rejoicing continues.

Pax et bonum

A small Christmas verse

2011-12-24T08:44:00.002-05:00

With ox and ass and manger and hay
St. Francis recalled that holy day.
And before that Greccio scene was done
The Father again provided his Son.

Merry Christmas to all!

Pax et bonum

He looks kind of familiar ...

2011-12-17T11:10:00.002-05:00

Pax et bonum

Thanksgiving Mass Haiku

2011-11-24T10:07:00.002-05:00

Thanksgiving Day Mass -
a shaft of sunlight stretches
toward the altar

Pax et bonum

Giving Thanks

2011-11-23T22:29:00.003-05:00

Thanksgiving Eve.

Pies baked. Squash cooked. Turkey ready to go into the oven tomorrow. Other foods can be prepared after Mass in the morning.

it's a day for family and food - and, yes, football.

But even more, it's a day set aside to give thanks.

Yet for me, it's just one of many such days.

I thank God each day for things like the moon shining down as I walk the dog, the stars twinkling between the clouds, a rabbit on the neighbor's lawn acting as if I can't see him, birds gracefully circling above a field, a squirrel clinging head down tail twitching on a tree, the sound of a child's laughter, the first taste of newly-opened beer, a familiar song on the radio.

Or even just the fact that I am able to enjoy such things.

Thank you, Lord.

Pax et bonum

Tis the season

2011-11-11T07:24:00.003-05:00

Last night I attended Santa School. The new company running the Santa program at the mall required all of Santa's helpers to attend. Tips, checking out costumes, signing some documents, etc.

This year, I will be able to be a natural-bearded helper for the first time - the school where I'm teaching now has allowed me to grow my beard out enough.

I'm excited. My first shift is Sunday.

A Mall Santa's Prayer

As I hold each precious child
let me treat each one
with the love and care I'd show
Your most holy Son.

Pax et bonum

A 40 Days Surprise

2011-10-23T06:54:00.002-04:00

I arrived at the Planned Parenthood clinic to do my regular Saturday morning hour for 40 Days for Life, when I got a pleasant surprise.

Usually when I arrive no one is there. I generally spend most of my shift alone. Sometimes, if I'm lucky, a person who is scheduled for the shift after mine arrives early - or someone with a spare moment stops by - and I get to chat and pray with another person.

Today, I arrived to find 8 women finishing a set of Mysteries of the Rosary. They were there from a Catholic study/prayer group. Several of them were first-timers.

Brief introductions, then some of them had to leave. Others stayed and we said the Glorious Mysteries. I love to say the Rosary by myself, but there's something wonderful about saying it with others.

We got a lot of thumbs-up and positive shout-outs from people driving by or going to the vet's across the street.

After the Glorious Mysteries most of the women had to leave, but a college student - a first-timer - remained with me. Turns out she's planning to be a teacher, so we chatted about that. She said it was nice to hear someone talk about teaching positively. I recommended a book to help with classroom management. We talked a little about music - she's planning to be a music teacher and I'm a guitar thumper. We discussed the pro-life cause, being involved in it, and touched on some safety issues. And then we discovered we had a mutual friend, a woman religious whom I knew long before she joined an order and with whom I'd played in church groups, and we talked about her.

The hour passed by quickly. A new group had arrived - praying down the street right in front of the clinic.

We both had to head out. I wished her well.

Those women - and particularly the young ones - give me hope.

Thank you, Lord, for that Saturday morning gift.

Pax et bonum

40 Days haiku

2011-10-22T11:39:00.002-04:00

outside the clinic

a prayer for each child lost

fallen leaves

Pax et bonum

Maureen Madonia, SFO, Rest in Peace

2011-10-15T17:10:00.002-04:00

Maureen Madonia, a gentle woman and a true Franciscan, passed away October 12 after a battle with leukemia.

She was the treasurer of our fraternity. Her husband, Joe, is our formation director.

She was a delightful person to know. She did so many thoughtful, kind acts.

I will miss her.

But the good thing is that I now have another saint I can ask to pray for me.

Pax et bonum

Haiku Fun

2011-10-09T18:39:00.002-04:00

This afternoon I went to the Haiku Poets of Upstate New York meeting. A great group.

They helped me revise a couple of haiku I was working on. I hope to submit those to some magazines. At the least, I'll use them with my writing class to show my students how even "grown-up" poets revise and seek input from others.

We also had some fun.

The presenter gave us a printout with 100 haiku regarded as classics. After we talked about our favorite ones on the printout, he suggested that we write haiku "inspired" by some of them - more than just parodies, but certainly with a bit of of humor.

I wrote two.

Original:

under the vast sky
I have no hat on (Hosai)

Mine:

into the vast sky
the hat no longer
on my head

Original:

beneath the tree
in the soup, in fish salad
cherry blossoms (Basho)

Mine:

on the table
in soup and salad bowls
dog hairs

Okay - my fellow haiku poets found them amusing!

Pax et bonum

Saturday Morning Sunshine

2011-10-08T04:52:00.002-04:00

I didn't make it to the Transitus celebration this week - that lingering cold. It's the first one I've missed since becoming involved with the Secular Franciscans. I have a physical on Monday and I'll bring that and assorted other ongoing ills to the doctor's attention. I may end up with an antibiotic, an inhaler, a recommendation for pain relief for my hands, and maybe even a heart scan of some sort! Ah, age is creeping up on me.

Whenever I feel under the weather I try to remember to offer it up - and to recall St. Francis' own suffering.

Today, though, I feel better. I'll be off to morning Mass, and then to Planned Parenthood for the 40 Days vigil. Work, the Chesterton Conference, and being sick has kept me from getting down there, and I feel like a prayer slacker! The sunshine and warm weather in the forecast today makes it easier to do it today - and I won't get worried glances from my Good Looking One.

Pax et bonum

Transforming the Culture: Rochester Chesterton Conference.

2011-10-01T21:17:00.008-04:00

Dale Ahlquist was on page 8 of his 9 page presentation on "Apocalypse Later" when he realized he did not have page 9 on the lectern. It was in his briefcase in another room.

Never mind.

A couple of quips, and he ran out to retrieve it, turning what could be for many speakers an embarrassing moment into a bit of whimsy and self-deprecating humor.

Typical fare for a Chesterton Conference.

Ahlquist, President of the American Chesterton Society and host of EWTN series on Chesterton, was one of four speakers for the conference. He was joined by Dr. Tom Martin, Professor of Philosophy at the University of Nebraska, Kearney, who spoke on "The Ultimate Test": Joseph Pearce, author of a myriad of books, including ones on Chesterton, J.R.R. Tolkien, Alexander Solzhenitsyn, Shakespeare, and more, who spoke about "Transforming the Culture Through Beauty"; and Kevin O'Brien, actor, writer and director of Theater of the Word Incorporated, who, well, stepped aside and let Hilaire Belloc "Roar Again."

Lots of observations on the culture. Lots of Chesterton. Lots of conversations in between the talks. Lots of books for sale (of course!).

A delightful day.

Pax et bonum

All Clear - Good Sailing Ahead

2011-09-28T17:39:00.003-04:00

The biopsy came back negative - much to my relief.

The 40 Days kickoff was a success - and I (and they) made it through my inflicting music on them.

So now, school work.

But I do have the Rochester Chesterton conference to look forward to this Saturday, and the Transitus on Monday.

Pax et bonum

They asked for a song

2011-09-25T11:23:00.003-04:00

I was asked to play some music for the 40 Days for Life kickoff this coming Tuesday. I agreed (ulp) then surveyed the scene when it comes to pro-life songs.

There are some nice pieces out there, but I didn't find a lot that were suited to my voice or my style.

So ...

I decided to start off with "Open the Eyes of My Heart" - explaining that so many people on both sides of the issue need to have their hearts and minds opened to God's loving touch.

For my closing song, I hearkened back to the civil rights movement. Since the pro-life movement IS a civil rights movement, I adapted "We shall overcome" with lines like "We'll pray side by side" and We shall stand for life."

In between, I wrote an original song.

I've been calling it "Just a Choice," though that may not stick.

Here are the words:

3 a.m.
Another night
She’s haunted by
A baby’s cry

In the night
No way to hide
From the emptiness
She feels inside

And all those things
she’d believed
she senses now
she’d been deceived

With a choice
she’s now a mother
who will never
hold her child.

He turns the page
He turns away
The words get lost
In what he can’t say

He’d shown support
He’d gone along
Despite a feeling
That it was wrong

He resents the loss
And that on that day
Society said he
really had no say

Without a choice
He’s now a father
Who will never
Hold his child

Interlude –

We were too young
We were afraid
We were too poor
The time was wrong
It was just a choice
It wasn’t human
It was just cells
It wasn’t alive
It couldn’t feel

It was just a choice
It was just a choice
It was just a choice

Safe within
His mother’s womb
But when she chose
It spelled his doom

He tried to flee
When death came near
He tried to scream
No one could hear

Now he rests
In God’s love
He’s forgiven but
Laments from above

Because of choice
They’re now parents
Who will never
Hold their child

Interlude ….

He wasn’t a choice
He was a child
Who now will never
Be held.

(Now if only the cold I have holds off enough for me to have any voice left!)

Pax et bonum

Franciscan Mirror

2011-09-24T21:35:00.003-04:00

A couple of days ago I received the fall issue of the Franciscan Mirror, the newsletter of the Blessed Kateri Tekakwitha Region (Upstate New York and Northwestern Pennsylvania) of the Secular Franciscan Order.

It's mailed to all SFOs in the region. It's the first issue I've received since professing July 9. In fact, news of the Rochester profession is in the issue, along with a picture of me and the six other people in our area who professed this summer.

It may sound silly, but it made me smile when I found it in the mail. It's another sign that I'm officially an SFO!

I was unable to make it to our fraternity meeting Friday - a bad cold I did not want to share with others - so the newsletter helped me to connect. And when I went to get a haircut today I was able to share about being a Franciscan with the barber. We were talking about deacons, and he said I seemed like someone who could be a deacon and asked if I'd considered it. I said that I'm actually quite happy to be a Franciscan. He asked what I meant and I told him a bit of history about the Secular Franciscan Order and what we do.

It felt good to witness. Thank you, Lord, for giving me that opportunity.

Pax et bonum

It Really Was a Franciscan Mass

2011-09-19T20:49:00.005-04:00

I didn't go to the St. Padre Pio Chapel Mass on Sunday to mark the Feast of the holy Franciscan. But my wife did.

It sounds like it was quite a spiritual adventure!

During the Mass, the deacon prepared some incense. He came out of the sacristy, clouds of scented smoke drifting up.

That's when the smoke detectors went off. The Chapel is also equipped with a sound system that bellows "Fire" when something is detected.

Panic.

It took a while before anyone could figure out how to turn it off. Meanwhile, one poor woman, cowering behind the life-sized statue of St. Francis, started it wobbling, raising fears that it might fall.

Alarms off, the Mass continued. It's at that point that the gathered faithful heard the sounds of approaching sirens. Moments later, fully-equipped fire fighters hustled into the Chapel and up to the altar. A priest, a deacon, a choir, a large number of worshipers, and firefighters all mixed together.

I can't help but think Saints Pio and Francis were having a good laugh.

Pax et bonum

Slice and Burn

2011-09-19T20:40:00.002-04:00

Yes, it sounds gross. But that's what the dermatologist did.

First, she cut off the offending growth on my face, keeping it for the biopsy. Then she cauterized the spot.

Hate that smell.

So tonight I have a little pain - not bad, really - and a bandage on my face. The site will have to be kept under bandage, with a dab of petroleum jelly, for four days or so as it heals. The biopsy results are due in about two weeks.

But the dermatologist said that the growth did not look like a typical cancer-type growth - though, of course, she couldn't say for sure. Still, that's encouraging.

If it's not cancer, I'm done. If it is cancerous, I have to go back for further excavating.

It is amazing the skill doctors have. I'm lucky to live in a place where I can get something disfiguring removed so easily. (I know, as a Franciscan, perhaps I shouldn't be so vain!)

Pax et bonum

A weekend of work

2011-09-17T13:00:00.003-04:00

One of the joys of being a teacher is that when the bell rings for dismissal, your work continues!

I have four class sets of exams to grade this weekend - about 8 hours worth. And lessons to plan, worksheets to create, a sub plan for the class I miss Monday while I get my biopsy, and an essay to prep for my writing class.

In between, I have to go to Church tonight to set up for Mass tomorrow and to rehearse the music - about two hours, and tomorrow I will play at Mass, then remove all the equipment before the next Mass.

I also have to practice the songs I'm doing for the 40 Days Kick-off Rally (I'm in the process of writing an original song as part of the set!). I also have to send out some news releases about the 40 Days campaign.

Meanwhile, the biopsy is on my mind.

But ... I'm happy!

I got to go to Mass this morning. I got to join fellow pro-lifers in praying outside Planned Parenthood. I got to catch up on some e-mail while getting focused for the work ahead. I Ate a lunch full of veggies from our own garden. I have a job I like. I have some wonderful students and co-workers.

Life is good.

Today is Feast of the Stigmata of St. Francis. He rejoiced in his suffering - in his sharing of Christ's suffering. My little distractions and concerns pale in comparison. I offer them up.

And I focus on the joys of this day.

Amen the Amen!

Pax et bonum

It may be nothing, but ...

2011-09-11T11:46:00.002-04:00

A couple of weeks ago a bump on my face started to grow. It's now about four/five times the size it was, and noticeable. Just the thing for the beginning of the school year.

I called my doctor and got an appointment for last Friday.

The physician assistant examined the lesion, and checked my lymph nodes. She referred me to a dermatologist for a biopsy. I got the impression she thought I should schedule it soon.

The dermatologist's office was closed by the time I could call, so I'll have to call on Monday to set up an appointment.

It may be nothing. But I would be lying if I didn't admit I am uneasy.

I could use a few prayers!

Pax et bonum

Back in the classroom again

2011-09-05T17:52:00.005-04:00

Tomorrow we have a faculty retreat and preparation time. On Wednesday the students arrive.

I'm back in the classroom again.

Of course, this marks the 11th year in a row now that I've been "back" in the classroom and my 17th first day overall (interrupted by a dozen years as a print journalist).

I am excited, nervous, ready, but not ready.

The last couple of days I've been planning what I would do in each class for the first couple of days, creating some worksheets and puzzles. I also went in to the school to decorate my homeroom. I still have to find a nice image of St. Francis to put up. Or maybe a San Damiano Cross.

In the last couple of days I've also seen in some conservative Catholic websites and blogs reports of a new study that's critical of Catholic schools.

The two-year study from an organization called Cardus - I plead ignorance of who or what that organization is - apparently does not paint a pretty picture of Catholic schools.

According to the study, students who attend Catholic schools, when compared with Catholics who attend public schools, are less likely to believe in moral absolutes, to respect the authority of the Catholic Church, to believe in the infallibility of Scripture, or to condemn premarital sex.

Of course, it's led to my more traditional brothers and sisters lamenting the state of Catholic education, the presence of non-Catholic teachers and students in the schools, and so on and so on.

I'm not trying to challenge or argue with them and their conclusions here. I have no data to counter or respond to their theories and conclusions.

On a positive note, I can say that my school is starting the year with that staff retreat, starts every day with a prayer over the P.A., suggests all teachers start each class with a prayer, has weekly prayer services and Communion services, is developing a program to require all students to be involved is social ministry projects, and much more. My department head and I were talking the other day about trying to get more Bible into the classroom.

As for the non-Catholic students, as one school official said, their parents knew what school they were sending their children to and the Catholic environment there. It's part of the package.

I know that my faith and my Franciscanism will not be hidden. I won't club my students over the head, certainly. I will be sensitive to the beliefs of students of other faiths, and I won't arbitrarily bring faith into class discussions. But I will no longer feel the need to hide my own beliefs - as I had to do at my previous school.

I'm looking forward to that.

Pax et bonum

Oops

2011-08-31T09:51:00.004-04:00

I was at a planning meeting for our local 40 Days for Life campaign. They were talking about the kick-off rally. Speakers had been asked and agreed to talk, a short video had been selected, a candle-light vigil was discussed, and then ... the subject of some music for the rally came up. One of the planners said, "We have someone here who plays guitar."

They all looked at me.

Oops.

Um, well, ah, I agreed.

If God gave me the ability to play and sing, shouldn't I use it for His work? That's a debate I have with myself all the time. Being in a band or the choir is one thing - I can hide behind the other musicians. But me solo? At my fraternity the possibility of me providing music has been raised. I've just smiled and avoided it so far.

But as for the rally - what do I play??

I kidded that I could rewrite a Lennon tune ("All we are saying, is give life a chance ...").

As I drove home I thought maybe I could try to write a song. I started running through some images and ideas. Nothing gelled, though I did get some line ideas, and a working title: "The Choice."

When I got home I searched online for pro-life songs. None hit me as tunes I could do or would feel comfortable doing. I did see one 40 Days rally with "They'll Know We Are Christians." I suppose if nothing else comes up I might consider that one.

Still mulling, this morning I thought of "Open the Eyes of My Heart" as a possibility. I always liked it, and I have music for it. I practiced it for a few minutes before Mass, transposing it to a more comfortable key for me. It might just work.

At Mass, suddenly I got an idea of what to do with the lines I came up for the original song. Three verses and a bridge. When I came home, I even tested out a bit of music that could go with it. Maybe ...

Assuming I finish the song and it's not too sappy, and I do sing "Open the Eyes of My Heart, I would still probably need a third song.

"Imagine there's no Planned Parenthood ...."

Pax et bonum

A question - and a response

2011-08-30T16:30:00.003-04:00

At a discussion site, I was asked the following:

Your Morning Mass Thingy--

I never understood the people who go to church merely for the fact that they believe if they do not go then they will go to hell.

I go to hear an informational, maybe uplifing, homily and to listen to the readings.

I usually try and take the message of the week and apply it in my world.

Never do I feel bd when I do not go.

What's your take??

I responded:

I go to Mass not because it's an obligation, or a rule, or a sin if I don't go. I go to be with the one I love and the one who so loved me He created me and was willing to die for me. I WANT to be there, just as I wanted to be with a girlfriend or my wife - only more so! I want to spend time with Him, to thank Him, to talk to Him, just to be with Him. Yes, I can be with Him in the woods, or on a mountainside, or while walking the dog, but Mass is a special time - a "date" of sorts. I go to hear a homily, to be with like-minded people, to feel a sense of community, to sing, true. But even more I go to be with my Lord, and so even a lousy homily, terrible music, irreverent people can't ruin it. I'm with HIm. When I miss Mass, I feel a sense of loss, just I have in the past when away from my family, my wife, my loved ones.

--------

My response was hurried, and perhaps not worded in the best way. Someone said some positive things about it, noting though that it was a bit "over the top."

I replied:

Over the top? Perhaps - but then, don't we celebrate passionate love?

Litany of the Love of God

Lord, have mercy on us.: Christ, have mercy on us.
Lord, have mercy on us.: Christ, hear us. Christ graciously hear us.
God, the Father of heaven,: Have mercy on us.
God the Son, Redeemer of the world,: Have mercy on us.
God, the Holy Ghost,: Have mercy on us.
Holy Trinity, one God,: Have mercy on us.
Thou Who art Infinite Love,: Have mercy on us.
Thou Who didst first love me,: Have mercy on us.
Thou Who commandest me to love Thee,: Have mercy on us.
With all my heart,: I Love Thee, O My God
With all my soul,: I Love Thee, O My God
With all my mind,: I Love Thee, O My God
With all my strength,: I Love Thee, O My God
Above all possessions and honors,: I Love Thee, O My God
Above all pleasures and enjoyments,: I Love Thee, O My God
More than myself, and everything belonging to me,: I Love Thee, O My God
More than all my relatives and friends,: I Love Thee, O My God
More than all men and angels,: I Love Thee, O My God
Above all created things in heaven or on earth,: I Love Thee, O My God
Only for Thyself,: I Love Thee, O My God
Because Thou art the sovereign Good,: I Love Thee, O My God
Because Thou art infinitely worthy of being loved,: I Love Thee, O My God
Because Thou art infinitely perfect,: I Love Thee, O My God
Even hadst Thou not promised me heaven,: I Love Thee, O My God
Even hadst Thou not menaced me with hell,: I Love Thee, O My God
Even shouldst Thou try me by want and misfortune,: I Love Thee, O My God
In wealth and in poverty,: I Love Thee, O My God
In prosperity and in adversity,: I Love Thee, O My God
In health and in sickness,: I Love Thee, O My God
In life and in death,: I Love Thee, O My God
In time and in eternity,: I Love Thee, O My God
In union with that love wherewith all the saints and all the angels love Thee in heaven,: I Love Thee, O My God
In union with that love wherewith the Blessed Virgin Mary loveth Thee,: I Love Thee, O My God
In union with that infinite love wherewith Thou lovest Thyself eternally,: I Love Thee, O My God

My God, Who dost possess in incomprehensible abundance all that is perfect and worthy of love, annihilate in me all guilty, sensual, and undue love for creatures. Kindle in my heart the pure fire of Thy love, so that I may love nothing but Thee or in Thee, until being so entirely consumed by holy love of Thee, I may go to love Thee eternally with the elect in heaven, the country of pure love. Amen.

His Holiness, Pope Pius VI, for private use

And then I cited:

How Do I Love Thee? (Sonnet 43)
by Elizabeth Barrett Browning

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. I love thee to the depth and breadth and height My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight For the ends of being and ideal grace. I love thee to the level of every day's Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light. I love thee freely, as men strive for right. I love thee purely, as they turn from praise. I love thee with the passion put to use In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith. I love thee with a love I seemed to lose With my lost saints. I love thee with the breath, Smiles, tears, of all my life; and, if God choose, I shall but love thee better after death.

Ah, but I only wish I could be conscious of that love every time I go to Mass!

Pax et bonum

A Franciscan Prayer for School

2011-08-28T18:42:00.004-04:00

One of the great things about the school where I'll be teaching this year is that we can pray before every class. I'd been looking for a short Franciscan prayer - and then found just what I needed

St. Francis: Prayer Before the Crucifix.

Most High,
glorious God,
enlighten the darkness of my heart.
Give me,
right faith,
sure hope,
and perfect charity.
Fill me with understanding
and knowledge,
that I may carry out
Your holy and true command.
Amen.

The prayer is one St. Francis composed at the foot of the crucifix in the church of San Damiano, where he received the command, "Francis, go and repair my house, which, as you see, is falling completely into ruin."

Father Jack Wintz, O.F.M., includes this prayer in his book, Friar Jack's Favorite Prayers. He notes "each time I pray it, I am more and more convinced that it reveals the authentic heart of St. Francis."

It begins, he observes, not focused on "some dark misery of the soul. Rather it begins focused on the glory and sublime beauty of God."

Father Wintz says he likes the fact Francis asked God to enlighten the darkness of his "heart" rather than "mind," as "heart" seems more the real St. Francis.

"Heart suggests the complexities of human love and the mystery of one's innermost longing - with all its related joys and sorrows."

I like the request that God fill whoever is saying the prayer with the understanding and knowledge needed to carry out His command, which is to reach out to humanity with "perfect charity" - to show others the same kind of love God has shown us.

It seems appropriate to ask for knowledge and understanding in a school prayer - and with a reminder to me as the teacher to show charity for my students!

Pax et bonum

Ulp Moments

2011-08-24T21:29:00.002-04:00

Teacher meetings are next week. Students arrive the following Wednesday. So much reading and prep yet to do!

I met with the former moderator of the school paper today. I'll be taking it over this year. I was concerned that she might not be happy about not moderating it, but she welcomed that.

She had plenty of good advice and suggestions. Great.

But it's going to take some work just getting it off the ground. Knowing she was not going to be moderating it this year, and not knowing what the new moderator would want, she didn't pick the new editors at the end of last year (as is normally done). That means that I have to take a week or so naming editors before we can even start planning issues. There are some good people who were on the paper last year who, hopefully, will want to return. If so, we'll be fine. If not - that's where an "ulp" comes in.

I'm looking at the paper as a long-term project. We'll make some simple improvements this year - getting out one more issue than last year, better photos, for example - then building it up more in the years ahead.

A lot of work.

Pretty exciting!

Pax et bonum

Perceptions

2011-08-22T07:26:00.003-04:00

I was taking part in a discussion about Catholic school experiences. My fellow discussers were telling "horror" stories and generally mocking their experiences. I was pointing out all the positive experiences and effects my 12 years of Catholic schooling had given me.

Besides the fact that I as usual became somewhat defensive in my responses (sigh), it also hit me that our differing perceptions were in their own ways true, but that our "truths" were formed by what we chose to remember.

As I put it elsewhere: One thing I've learned is that how we perceive something depends in large part on how we choose to perceive it.

I thought of St. Francis and lepers.

When he was young, he abhorred lepers, as did many people in his society. They were ugly, deformed, diseased. They had open wounds. They were missing body parts. There were often dirty and smelled. They were treated as outcasts, as vile sinners.

But when he learned to look with the eyes of faith, he saw Christ in them. They were beautiful. They were to be loved.

The lepers had not changed. Francis did.

In the same way, saints over the years perceived the beauty in others the world often regarded negatively. Mother Teresa. Catherine Doherty. Dorothy Day. Father Damian. Peter Claver.

I think of so many good people today who run homeless shelters, health clinics, hospices, who work with the physically and mentally and spiritually ill.

These holy people are not blind. They see the sicknesses, the deformities, the sins. But they choose to focus on what is good and beautiful.

They choose to focus on Jesus in others.

I pray that I might find the strength to choose to see what they see.

Pax et bonum

Spiritual reading - maybe something art related?

2011-08-21T10:34:00.003-04:00

I've been doing a lot of school-related reading - I have to finish the summer reading books before I test the students on them in three weeks, after all! It's enjoyable reading, as is the reading of the works we'll be doing in class to start the year.

But I've been missing out on spiritual reading.

I tried some mystical Franciscan poetry, but found it hard to follow after reading all that school related stuff.

I looked on my shelf.

That's when I spotted one of those books I'd been meaning to read, but it got stuck on the shelf between some other books and was overlooked.

The Beauty of Faith: Using Christians Art to Spread the Good News by Jem Sullivan. With a forward by Supreme Knight Carl Anderson. And the text of Pope John Paul II's 1999 "Letter to Artists."

Hmm.

It's short. I'll give it a shot. Then dive into something Franciscan.

Pax et bonum

Archbishop Romero on Peace

2011-08-20T07:28:00.001-04:00

Peace is not the product of terror or fear.

Peace is not the silence of cemeteries.

Peace is not the silent result of violent repression.

Peace is the generous, tranquil contribution of all to the good of all.

Peace is dynamism. Peace is generosity.

It is right and it is duty.

-- Archbishop Oscar Romero

Pax et bonum

Shhh

2011-08-20T07:01:00.004-04:00

Over the years I have written several blogs - including a couple of group ones.

One of the blogs, my first one, was my main one. That one had more than 2,000 posts stretching back over six years. It included poetry, stories, silliness, music videos, and more. The "more" included views on politics and social issues - sometimes strong views.

I was hired this summer to teach at a school where the students are computer savvy, so I knew it was only a matter of time before they found the blog. I changed some things about it, but I and it could still be found online. So, after talking with my new principal, I retired that blog, and basically blocked it. I have kept the posts there only because there are some that I want to save - but I don't have time before the school year begins to go through more than 2000 to save the ones worth saving. I'm hoping all the things I've done to hide it and block it will be enough to prevent student access.

Then there's this blog.

It's less well known. It's harder to find. My name is not on it. And in this one I don't get into the political/social discussions I did on my other bog. The principal said that the group blogs - one devoted to Chesterton, for example, or one for my Secular Franciscan group, should be no problem. I'm hoping that's the case with this one.

And perhaps it is for the best. I tend to be a contentious person, and sometimes my views are not expressed in the most Franciscan-like ways. Plus, that blog was sometimes a way to show off or even to attack and goad others. Maybe God is using this to help me move away from such things - online, and in daily life.

For now, I will continue to post here on spiritual matters, especially ones focusing on my journey as a Franciscan.

Pax et bonum

Oh yeah?

2011-08-19T07:25:00.002-04:00

I'm still working on this Franciscan thing. I like to argue and brag too much. I suspect I won't get it right until I go Home!

Pax et bonum

Little Flowers of St. Francis, Chapter II

2011-07-30T11:18:00.000-04:00

OF BROTHER BERNARD OF QUINTAVALLE, THE FIRST COMPANION OF ST FRANCIS

The first companion of St Francis was Brother Bernard of Assisi, who was converted in the following way: St Francis had not yet taken the religious habit, though he had renounced the world, and had so given himself to penance and mortification that many looked upon him as one out of his mind. He was scoffed at as a madman, was rejected and despised by his relations and by strangers, who threw stones and mud at him when he passed; yet he went on his way, accepting these insults as patiently as if he had been deaf and dumb. Then Bernard of Assisi, one of the richest and most learned nobles of the city, began to consider deeply the conduct of St Francis; how utterly he despised the world, how patiently he suffered injuries, and how his faith remained firm, though he had been for two years an object of contempt and rejected by all. He began to think and say within himself, "It is evident that this brother must have received great graces from God"; and so resolved to invite him to sup and to sleep in his house. St Francis having accepted the invitation, Bernard, who was resolved to contemplate the sanctity of his guest, ordered a bed to be prepared for him in his own room, where a lamp burned all night. Now St Francis, in order to conceal his sanctity, so soon as he entered the room, threw himself upon the bed, pretending to fall asleep. Bernard likewise soon after went to bed, and began to snore as if sleeping soundly. On this, St Francis, thinking that Bernard was really fast asleep, got up and began to pray. Raising his hands and eyes to heaven, he exclaimed with great devotion and fervour, "My God! my God!" at the same time weeping bitterly; and thus he remained on his knees all night, repeating with great love and fervour the words, "My God! my God!" and none others.

And this he did because, being enlightened by the Holy Spirit, he contemplated and admired the divine majesty of God, who deigned to take pity on the perishing world, and to save not only the soul of Francis, his poor little one, but those of many others also through his means. For, being enlightened by the Holy Ghost, he foresaw the great things which God would deign to accomplish through him and through his Order; and considering his insufficiency and unworthiness, he prayed and called upon the Lord, through his power and wisdom, to supply, help and accomplish that which of himself he could not do.

Then Bernard, seeing by the light of the lamp the devout actions of St Francis and the expression of his countenance, and devoutly considering the words he uttered, was touched by the Holy Spirit, and resolved to change his life. Next morning, therefore, he called St Francis, and thus addressed him: "Brother Francis, I am disposed in heart wholly to leave the world, and to obey thee in all things as thou shalt command me." At these words, St Francis rejoiced in spirit and said, "Bernard, a resolution such as thou speakest of is so difficult and so great an act, that we must take counsel of the Lord Jesus Christ, and pray to him that he may be pleased to show us what is his will, and may teach us to follow it. Let us then go together to the Bishop's palace, where we shall find a good priest who will say Mass for us. We will then remain in prayer till the third hour, imploring the Lord to point out to us the way he wishes us to select, and to this intent we will open the Missal three times." And when Bernard answered that he was well pleased with this proposal, they set out together, heard Mass, and after they had remained in prayer till the time fixed, the priest, at the request of St Francis, took up Missal, then, having made the sign of the holy cross, he opened it three times, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.

The first place which he lit upon was at the answer of Christ to the young man who asked of him the way to perfection: If thou wilt be perfect, go, sell all that thou hast and give to the poor, and come, follow me. The second time he opened at the words which the Saviour addressed to the Apostles when he sent them forth to preach the Word of Truth: Take nothing with you for your journey: neither staff, nor scrip, nor bread, nor money; wishing to teach them thereby to commit the care of their lives to him, and give all their thoughts to the preaching of the Holy Gospel. When the Missal was opened a third time they came upon these words: If any one will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me.

Then St Francis, turning to Bernard, said: "This is the advice that the Lord has given us; go and do as thou hast heard; and blessed be the Lord Jesus Christ who has pointed out to thee the way of his angelic life." Upon this, Bernard went and sold all that he had. Now he was very rich, and with great joy he distributed his wealth to widows, to orphans, to prisoners, to monasteries, to hospitals, and to pilgrims, in all which St Francis assisted him with prudence and fidelity.

Now it happened that a man of the name of Silvester, seeing how St Francis gave so much money to the poor, being urged on by avarice, went to him and said: "Thou didst not pay me enough for the stones I sold thee to repair the church; now that thou hast money, pay me what thou owest." St Francis, much surprised at such a demand, but, according to the precepts of the Scriptures, not wishing to dispute with him, gave it to Silvester, saying that, if he wanted more, he would give it to him. Silvester, being satisfied, returned home; but in the evening of the same day he reflected on his avarice, and on the holiness and the fervour of St Francis. That night also he saw St Francis in a vision, and it seemed to him as if a golden cross came out of his mouth, which reached up to heaven and extended to the extreme east and west. After this vision he gave all he possessed to the poor, for the love of God, and made himself a Brother Minor. He became so holy, and was favoured with such special graces, that he spake with the Lord as a friend speaks with a friend, of which St Francis was often a witness, as we shall see further on. Bernard likewise received from God many graces - he was ravished in contemplation, and St Francis said he was worthy of all reverence, and that he had founded the Order, because he was the first who had abandoned the world, giving all he possessed to the poor of Christ, keeping back nothing for himself; and practising evangelical poverty, placing himself naked in the arms of the Crucified, whom may we all bless eternally. Amen.

Pax et bonum

Rosary - and religious art

2011-07-20T15:50:00.002-04:00

When I say the Rosary, I try to meditate on the Mysteries.

Perhaps meditate is too strong a word for my weak efforts.

I think about them, how I can relate to the experiences and feelings in each mystery, and how they might apply to my life. More often, I simply focus on an image related to the particular Mystery.

Most of the images that come to mind are based on classic paintings and icons. Perhaps my imagination is not rich to come up with images of my own.

It occurred to me that even if focusing on such images is not as deep as meditating on the Mysteries might go, it is still a worthy thing. And it is a worthy thing that would be harder if not for centuries of great religious art. This is argument art education, and for works of art in churches, schools, and our homes.

It is also an argument for the creation of more art. Each generation, each civilization needs good art that can help fire up the imagination and bring the faith to life. Alas, I can't think of too many contemporary pieces that can do this - but that might be to my own limited knowledge.

One area for such creativity is film. The 13th Day is full of rich images. Jesus of Nazareth also comes to mind. (Many people also find The Passion of the Christ inspiring; alas, I find it too violent for my tastes.) There are a few other films I sometimes think of.

I'm sure there are wonderful paintings, sculptures, films, and more out there. I need their beauty and devout passion to help inspire me. I need to seek them out. And maybe I also need to create some images of my own.

Or maybe I need to meditate more deeply!

Pax et bonum

A stumble

2011-07-19T21:02:00.002-04:00

I was talking on the phone and a former coworker came up. I had learned something questionable about the person. I knew I shouldn't - I consciously thought that I shouldn't, there was no need to share it - but I went ahead and shared it.

My mouth again.

It's all well and good to proclaim myself a professed Secular Franciscan, but I need to learn to act like one.

Lord, help me to resist temptation to talk when I shouldn't.

Pax et bonum

Secular Franciscan Order Prayer for Vocations

2011-07-19T11:37:00.001-04:00

NATIONAL PRAYER FOR VOCATIONS

TO THE

SECULAR FRANCISCAN ORDER

O Good and Gracious God,

God of mercy, compassion, generosity,

and love,

As we live our lives today

in the model of St. Francis,

choosing daily to live

the Gospel life,

Help us to help others

hear Your call.

Help us to help others

to recognize their vocation

as a Secular Franciscan

that You have already

planted in their heart.

Help us, so that together

we all may work

to bring the Gospel to life.

Amen!

Marian R. Crosby, SFO

NAFRA Chapter 2010

Scottsdale, AZ Pax et bonum

St. Francis (Franciscan art)

2011-07-17T18:15:00.002-04:00

(Ribera)

Pax et bonum

It's all about me (the rest of you are wrong!)

2011-07-12T19:18:00.003-04:00

In cleaning out some old files, I came across old performance reviews from previous jobs.

Some of them were not good.

Indeed, I left a couple of jobs after bad reviews - usually voluntarily, sometimes not.

I quit my last job in part because of a review I considered unfair. It was my choice to leave, but there was still a bad taste in my mouth.

However, in looking at some of those previous bad reviews, I saw some patterns.

I grumbled defensively in every case about the review being unfair and inaccurate.

Yet some of the things they criticized me for - some of the things I got defensive about - were fair criticisms. I tend to offend with my sense of humor. I tend to come across as arrogant. I tend to be sarcastic. I tend to seem angry and hostile. I tend to have a hard time interacting with others and relating to them.

I've always tried to excuse my words and actions by saying I have an off-beat sense of humor or that I'm reserved. Those traits may be true of me, but I relied on them as excuses rather than trying to change or grow when I could or should.

Now that I'm starting a new job, I'm working on making a conscious effort to watch my words and to interact better with others. I'm trying to smile more and to focus on the positive. I'm trying to bite my tongue when I want to make some smart aleck or critical remark. I'm trying to make time for others, to listen to them and to show them that I care about them.

With God's help, maybe this time I'll get it right!

Pax et bonum

At the abbey

2011-07-10T21:17:00.002-04:00

At the Abbey of the Genesee
between hours
the chapel was mostly dark
and quiet
and empty
except for one monk
engaged in some devotions
our Lord in the tabernacle
and us
praying silently.

But outside
the rustling leaves
the singing birds
the chirping insects
chanted their own
praises
to the Creator.

Pax et bonum

Profession Day

2011-07-09T21:16:00.001-04:00

I made my profession today. I am now officially a Secular Franciscan.

Alleluia!

Pax et bonum

Seeing Jesus in Others

2011-07-02T21:27:00.002-04:00

Next Saturday I will make my profession as a member of the Secular Franciscan Order.

I am excited.

I am unworthy.

To prepare, I went to Confession today.

I've been troubled lately by the usual sins - the weaknesses that Satan uses to disturb my soul and to pry me away from the Lord.

One of those failings is being critical of others. I'm not talking about legitimately (and respectfully) pointing out errors for the purpose of helping others and advancing the Kingdom. I'm talking about all the pettiness, sarcasm, and negativity to which I am prone.

Father had a suggestion: Think of these people I'm criticising as Jesus. See Jesus in them.

I thought of some of the people I'm inclined to criticize. Ironically, one of them is the very priest to whom I was confessing!

Jesus?

Yes, He is indeed in each of these persons, and so when I mock, tear down, cling to ill-feelings, gossip about these others, I am doing it to Jesus.

Sorry Lord. Please, help me to be open to Your Saving Grace as I face these temptations. Help me to be aware that I am not alone.

Help me always to be aware that each person I meet is You.

Pax et bonum

Evangelization and the Secular Franciscan Order

2011-06-30T21:55:00.003-04:00

At our last fraternity meeting, we had a representative of the regional organization.

She had some positive observations. She also suggested that we work at promoting the fraternity to attract more members - and to help more people discover the Secular Franciscan Order and to discern if they have a calling.

Indeed, there may be people who would be attracted, who are called, but have never even heard of the SFO.

After I left the meeting, I thought of my father.

He was a very successful insurance salesman who won awards for the number of policies he sold.

Dad was never "off." He'd chat up people and distribute his card no matter where we were. Many a waitress got a generous tip and his business card when we went out to lunch, for example. Fix his car? You got his business card. Sell him some tools or grass seed? He'd leave a card with you. He'd even mail greeting cards to customers and even prospective customers to help mark significant events - marriages, births, new homes, and so on - just to keep his name before them.

I and my fellow SFOs could learn a lot from him about reaching out to others.

The representative suggested that we leave information about the fraternity in various places. There was even joking about leaving some at dentist offices.

I've been taking her advice. I ran off some of the fraternity's trifold brochures and have been leaving them in churches I visit and the St. Padre Pio Chapel. I'll be taking some to the local Catholic bookstore, and this Saturday I'll give one to each of the persons gathered at Planned Parenthood to pray.

I'll keep on looking for places to leave them.

Pax et bonum

A Franciscan Moment With Brother Rat

2011-06-27T10:02:00.003-04:00

My wife is for the birds.

Literally.

She's a member of Audubon.

Our backyard has several feeders and birdhouses. We have to make regular runs to buy 40-pound bags of seeds.

But along with the birds come some other critters.

Squirrels. (For whom I have a certain fondness, so we also feed them!)

Chipmunks. (Not singing, though.)

A woodchuck. A large fellow that makes my dog nervous.

And ...

At least one rat.

He took up residence under the garage, and has been spotted making runs out to seed debris beneath the largest feeder.

My wife refers to him as Rattus rattus. But since he's a brown rat, he's technically Rattus norvegicus. Not that it matters.

He's a rat.

The other guests are welcome. But Brother Rat, while still one of God's creatures, is an uninvited guest.

Besides, he and/or his brothers and sisters got into some books I had stored in the garage.

Now I know Francis was not a big fan of books, but to chew them that way ....

Options:

Poison.

A deadly rat trap.

A capture alive trap.

I opted for the latter.

Yesterday, a chipmunk. I let him go in the yard.

This morning, Rattus norvegicus was in there.

He did not look happy.

After morning Mass, I took him to a nearby park where there's a picnic area and a large often-full dumpster. Mmmmm.

I released the lock on the trap. He leaped out in mid air, hit the grass running, and was gone.

I didn't even get a chance to preach to him!

We'll watch to see is any of his buddies show up under the bird feeder before resetting the trap.

As for Brother Rat, I hope he eats well and has a long happy life.

Just not in our yard.

Pax et bonum

Lift the City - a Franciscan Eucharistic flash mob

2011-06-27T09:51:00.000-04:00

This is wonderful!

Pax et bonum

A Franciscan quotataion

2011-06-26T10:08:00.001-04:00

Above all the grace and the gifts that Christ gives to his beloved is that of overcoming self.

~ St. Francis of Assisi

Pax et bonum

A Prayer by St. Thomas More, SFO

2011-06-22T17:36:00.001-04:00

Give me the grace, Good Lord

To set the world at naught. To set the mind firmly on You and not to hang upon the words of men's mouths.

To be content to be solitary. Not to long for worldly pleasures. Little by little utterly to cast off the world and rid my mind of all its business.

Not to long to hear of earthly things, but that the hearing of worldly fancies may be displeasing to me.

Gladly to be thinking of God, piteously to call for His help. To lean into the comfort of God. Busily to labor to love Him.

To know my own vileness and wretchedness. To humble myself under the mighty hand of God. To bewail my sins and, for the purging of them, patiently to suffer adversity.

Gladly to bear my purgatory here. To be joyful in tribulations. To walk the narrow way that leads to life.

To have the last thing in remembrance. To have ever before my eyes my death that is ever at hand. To make death no stranger to me. To foresee and consider the everlasting fire of Hell. To pray for pardon before the judge comes.

To have continually in mind the passion that Christ suffered for me. For His benefits unceasingly to give Him thanks.

To buy the time again that I have lost. To abstain from vain conversations. To shun foolish mirth and gladness. To cut off unnecessary recreations.

Of worldly substance, friends, liberty, life and all, to set the loss at naught, for the winning of Christ.

To think my worst enemies my best friends, for the brethren of Joseph could never have done him so much good with their love and favor as they did him with their malice and hatred.

These minds are more to be desired of every man than all the treasures of all the princes and kings, Christian and heathen, were it gathered and laid together all in one heap.

Amen

(Written while a prisoner in the Tower of London)

Pax et bonum

St. Thomas More

2011-06-22T17:32:00.002-04:00

Today is the Feast Day of St. Thomas More - martyr, humanist, writer, Chancellor of England for Henry VIII, and Secular Franciscan.

He died rather than accept Henry's attempt to divorce his wife, and then to break from the Catholic Church.

Pax et bonum

St. Francis: Corpus Christi Reflections

2011-06-20T07:29:00.002-04:00

Let the entire man be seized with fear;
let the whole world tremble;
let heaven exult when Christ,
the Son of the Living God,
is on the altar in the hands of the priest.

O admirable height and stupendous condescension!
O humble sublimity!
O sublime humility!
that the Lord of the universe,
God and the Son of God,
so humbles Himself that for our salvation
He hides Himself under a morsel of bread.

Consider, brothers, the humility of God
and "pour out your hearts before Him,
and be ye humbled that ye may be exalted by Him.

Do not therefore keep back anything for yourselves
that He may receive you entirely
who gives Himself up
entirely to you.

- From the "Letter to all the Friars

Pax et bonum

Three Weeks to Profession

2011-06-19T11:28:00.002-04:00

The time is drawing near: On July 9, I will be professed.

I feel a sense of relief that the profession formation process is nearing its end - though, of course, formation will continue for the rest of my life. I also feel a sense of unworthiness, knowing how un-Franciscan-like my thoughts, words, and actions can be, and how inconsistent and weak my prayer life is. Room for more growth!

But most of all, I feel joy. I will be part of a world-wide family, a family dedicated to loving and serving the Lord.

After years as a lone child, I now have thousands of brothers and sisters!

Pax et bonum

By their fruits ...

2011-05-23T18:57:00.003-04:00

I have three daughters. They've all grown up and moved from home.

They are good, caring young women. They all have jobs - something to be thankful for these days.

But not one of them has remained Catholic. None of them goes to church - any church. They hold views on some issues that go against Catholic teachings.

Only one is married, and she's getting divorced. There are no grandchildren - and there doesn't seem any chances of even one in the near future.

I know that they are adults and so how they live is between them and God. I can't make them believe or go to church.

And I know that they are young and that like many other young people they may eventually return to faith.

But there's still a part of me that looks at my own personal and faith failings and how they affected them. I was not always the best Catholic - I even left the Church for a while. I have not always acted in the most Christian ways. My marriage to their mother failed for a number of reasons, some of them my fault.

Had I been a better role model, had I been a better father and husband, had I acted more proactively, maybe their paths would be different. Maybe.

Or maybe not.

But still, I have to take responsibility for not doing a better job as a father and a spiritual shepherd.

God forgive me.

Pax et bonum

Social Media Awareness

2011-05-01T12:14:00.003-04:00

Luke 12:3 Therefore whatever you have said in the dark shall be heard in the light, and what you have whispered in private rooms shall be proclaimed upon the housetops. (Catholic RSV)

A teacher acquaintance of mine had a very nice blog - one that I read regularly and enjoyed. It was clever and funny, and she often had good insights.

She has suspended it for the time being.

From what I gather, the reason she did so was that some parents complained about it in some way. I don't know how many parents actually complained - it could have been just one set of parents - what exactly was the nature of their complaints.

The blog was certainly not controversial - mine is far more so, and mine is tame compared to some I've seen. She did not dwell on political matters or social issues. But maybe she revealed too much about her personal life and her teaching experiences. Perhaps some of her students found it and started reading and commenting on it, breaking down the barrier we teachers are supposed to keep these days between ourselves and our students.

I've heard of teachers who did get in trouble for what they've published on blogs or Facebook or other such sites. They made comments that they would not make in class or posted pictures that were not appropriate.

Teachers have been fired because of such things.

As far as I can tell, none of that was true of my acquaintance's blog. But nevertheless it's now silent.

As teachers, we have to be careful.

But it goes beyond fear for our jobs.

As Christians - and Franciscans - we are called to be exemplary in how we speak and how we act, and to avoid things that can lead us into sin. We should speak out - or write - about the moral issues of the day, but we are called to do so in a loving respectful way.

When it comes to social media, Pope Benedict has urged us to use it, but to it wisely, "to contribute to the satisfaction of the desire for meaning, truth and unity which remain the most profound aspirations of each social being."

Of course, even something is said in a loving respectful - even innocent - way can draw strong responses.

Her experience is a cautionary tale for me.

I've been lucky in that I teach at a Christian school where because of their beliefs the students and their parents do not use social media - and have only limited internet access. Some of my posts on social issues or politics have not been a problem. But if I do go to another school some day, I will have to be more careful and perhaps in some cases use less strong language.

My mouth, my opinionated remarks, and my sense of humor have gotten me in trouble in the past.

As Luke notes above, what we say in the dark may come to light, and even when we think we are whispering in private "chat rooms" we may find our words proclaimed from the housetops (or cited by our employers!).

I hope my acquaintance will be able to blog again some day.

I hope I don't have to stop doing so myself some day.

St. Francis' Lenten Fast

2011-03-11T17:45:00.004-05:00

(from The Little Flowers of St. Francis)

HOW ST FRANCIS PASSED THE TIME OF LENT IN AN ISLAND, ON THE LAKE OF PERUGIA, WHERE HE FASTED FORTY DAYS AND FORTY NIGHTS, EATING NO MORE THAN HALF OF ONE LOAF

The true servant of Christ, St Francis, was in certain things like unto a second Christ given to the world for the salvation of souls. Wherefore God the Father willed that in many points he should be conformed to his Son, Jesus Christ, as we have already explained in the calling of his twelve companions, as also in the mystery of the holy stigmata, and in a fast of forty days which he made in the manner following:St Francis, one day of the Carnival, was near the Lake of Perugia, in the house of one of his devout children, with whom he had spent the night, when he was inspired by God to go and pass the time of Lent in an island on the lake. Wherefore St Francis begged his friend, for the love of God, to convey him in his boat to an island uninhabited by man: the which he should do during the night of Ash-Wednesday, so that none might know where he was; and the friend, because of the great devotion he bore to St Francis, agreed to his request, and conveyed him to the said island, St Francis taking with him naught but two small loaves.

When they had reached the island, his friend left him and returned home; the saint earnestly entreating him to reveal to no one where he was, and not to come and fetch him before Holy Thursday; to which he consented.St Francis being left alone, and there being no dwelling in the island in which he could take shelter, entered into a thick part of the wood all overgrown with brambles and other creeping plants, and forming as it were a kind of hut, there he began to pray and enter into the contemplation of divine things. And there he passed the whole of Lent without drinking or eating save half of one of the small loaves he had taken with him, as we learned from his friend who, going to fetch him on Holy Thursday, found one of the loaves untouched and the other only half consumed. It is believed that St Francis ate this half out of reverence for our Blessed Lord, who fasted forty days and forty nights without taking any material food; for by eating this bit of bread he put aside the temptation to vainglory, and yet fasted forty days and forty nights in imitation of the Saviour. In later times God worked many miracles, through the merits of the saint, on the spot where St Francis had fasted so wonderfully, on which account people began to build houses and dwell there, and little by little a town rose up, with a convent called the Convent of the Isle; and to this day the inhabitants of that town hold in great respect and great devotion the spot in which St Francis passed the time of Lent.

(What an example: To eat a little just to avoid vainglory. How often I feel compelled to call attention to myself for lesser deeds.)

Pax et bonum

Formation: Final readings

2011-03-06T14:25:00.002-05:00

I finished the last formal formation lesson - a discussion of the importance of Jesus and following His example for Franciscians, and, of course, Christians as a whole. There was a wonderful excerpt from Chesterton's life of St. Francis as part of it.

We will talk about it next Friday. Then I will rejoin the main meetings for the ongoing formation the Fraternity is undergoing (looking at the writings of St. Francis and St. Clare).

It will be nice not to have to separate from the rest of the group every other meeting.

Profession is still set for July 9. Alleluia! (I can say that for three more days, then Lent begins!)

Pax et bonum

Profession - July 9

2011-02-27T07:39:00.001-05:00

The profession day has been tentatively set: July 9. Alleluia!

Profession - perhaps in August

2011-02-12T09:06:00.003-05:00

At last night's formation session, the formation director for my Secular Franciscan Order fraternity noted that we had just one more lesson to go - we will do it in March.

Then he said that a final profession ceremony will likely be held for our area this summer, based on when the Franciscan priest who celebrates the profession Mass and services here is available (he has to come up from New York City). There are several candidates from the other local fraternity ready for profession, and it seems my fraternity thinks I'm ready. Generally, the professions here are held in August.

I am ... excited, reflective.

I have been working for this day for several years now with the SFOs, and I have a life-long attachment to Franciscan beliefs and spirituality. I have been searching for so long for a spiritual path, a way to grow, and, to be honest, a check on my more lazy, selfish, sinful side.

But at the same time I feel so unworthy. I don't mean that in the "Hey, look at me acting all humble" way.

I really do feel that my prayer life is not as strong as it should be.

That I too often give in to the temptations that nip at my soul.

That I'm prone to be non-Franciscan in the my words and thoughts. Harsh. Sarcastic. Judgmental.

And I fear that when people look at things I do and say they will remark in incredulity, "He's a Franciscan?"

Profession is not an end, of course. It doesn't mean one is a finished product. It's just one more step in the ongoing process of spiritual growth.

That won't end until I stand before God.

Pax et bonum

Mary

2011-02-11T17:47:00.003-05:00

As part of formation, I read some material about Mary.

Francis was strongly devoted to Mary. He chose her as the Patroness and Advocate of the Franciscan Order.

To be honest, Mary was always a stumbling block for me. I accepted that she was the Mother of Jesus. I had no problem believing in the Virgin Birth, nor in honoring her for her willingness to sacrifice and to be the Blessed Mother of Jesus.

But I always had questions about the idea of her perpetual virginity. Why could she and Joseph not have had children after Jesus was born? What was wrong with accepting that Mary and Joseph could have sex?

I was also not a big fan of Marian apparitions. They struck me as like what I saw at Charismatic prayer meetings: Spiritually inspired, but often linked to a certain kind of emotionalism that was alien to my Scotch/Irish nature.

Then there were the doctrines of her Immaculate Conception - why could she not be just like us? - and the Assumption. I could accept that she was assumed into heaven; it had happened before. But to make it an infallible teaching? It didn't seem to me to be necessary. And a pig-headed part of me did not like being TOLD I had to believe something.

My doubts about Mary were among the reasons I strayed from the Church.

Even when I returned, I accepted the Marian teachings largely as a matter of faith: Good and holy people who are far wiser than I accepted these teachings, therefore I accepted them. I even grew to love the Rosary and some of the Marian prayers.

But a part of me never warmed up to the teachings.

It's still an area where I need to grow.

St. Francis, pray for me.

Mary, pray for me.

Paxc et bonum

Formation Nearing End?

2011-02-05T12:11:00.003-05:00

I am currently studying the materials for two of the final three sessions linked with Candidacy. We will be talking about those two sections next week.

After that, there's just one more session.

And then? I don't know. Will there be a profession ceremony for the two local Fraternities this summer? Will the Fraternity feel that I am indeed ready? Do I?

The Session 10 materials have got me thinking. They focus on "Public Profession."

The materials point out that profession is more than a matter of personal piety. It is a public commitment to witness the Franciscan way of life.

I certainly continually fall short when it comes to that way of life. I'm contentious, prone to sharp word and judgement, self-indulgent. My prayer life continues to be spotty, inconsistent.

Is this what a professed Franciscan should be like?

Would someone meeting me recognize me as a Franciscan?

Of course, even professing is not an end. It's part of the ongoing process of growth. A professed Franciscan must continue to study and pray and grow.

No resting on one's brown robe!

I renew my commitment to continue growing.

Daily prayer. Daily Scripture reading. Spiritual reading. Taking care that every word, every look, every action is guided by Christ's love.

Maybe I will eventually be worthy of being called a Franciscan.

Pax et bonum

Two Salutations from St. Francis

2011-01-29T10:43:00.005-05:00

Last night at our fraternity meeting we read two prayers by St. Francis: The Salutation of the Blessed Virgin Mary, and The Salutation of the Virtues.

We had a lively discussion trying to figure out some of the parts of these prayers, and what precisely St. Francis meant in some passages.

Why did he end a prayer to Mary with a salute to the virtues?

Why did he pair the virtues that he did: Wisdom and Simplicity, Poverty and Humility, Charity and Obedience?

One observation I made is that he was a poet, not a theologian, so "reason" is not always the best approach to what he wrote.

But I did wonder what he meant by "carnal fear"?

Fear of temptations of the flesh? Fear for one's physical life that keeps one from fully committing to the adventure and danger of faith?

Still mulling that over.

The Salutation of the Blessed Virgin Mary

Hail, O Lady, Holy Queen,
Mary, holy Mother of God:
you are the Virgin made Church
chosen by the most Holy Father in heaven
whom He consecrated with His most holy beloved Son
and with the Holy Spirit the Paraclete,
in whom there was and is all fullness of grace and every good.

Hail His Palace!
Hail His Tabernacle!
Hail His Dwelling!
Hail His Robe!
Hail His Servant!
Hail His Mother!

And hail all you holy virtues
Which are poured into the hearts of the faithful
through the grace and enlightenment of the Holy Spirit,
that from being unbelievers,
you may make them faithful to God.

The Salutation of the Virtues

Hail, Queen Wisdom, may the Lord protect you
with your sister, holy pure Simplicity.

Lady, holy Poverty, may the Lord protect you
with your sister, holy Humility.

Lady, holy Charity, may the Lord protect you
with your sister, holy Obedience.

O most holy Virtues, may the Lord protect all of you,
from Whom you come and proceed.

There is surely no one in the entire world
who can possess any one of you
unless he dies first.

Whoever possesses one of you
and does not offend the others,
possesses all.

And each one destroys vices and sins.

Holy Wisdom destroys
Satan and all his subtlety.
Pure holy Simplicity destroys
all the wisdom of this world
and the wisdom of the body.

Holy Poverty destroys
the desire of riches
and avarice
and the cares of this world.
Holy Humility destroys
pride
and all the people who are in the world
and all the things that belong to the world.

Holy Charity destroys
every temptation of the devil and of the flesh
and every carnal fear.
Holy Obedience destroys
every wish of the body and of the flesh
and binds its mortified body
to obedience of the Spirit
and to obedience of one's brother
and the person who possesses her is subject and submissive
to all persons in the world
and not to man only
but even to all beasts and wild animals
so that they may do whatever they want with him
inasmuch as it has been given to them from above by the Lord.

Pax et bonum

Blessed Pope John XXIII saves me from books

2011-01-16T13:40:00.003-05:00

The Good Looking One and I went out to the Catholic bookstore in Spencerport yesterday.

I stumbled across at least five books that in the past I would have been tempted to buy. And a couple of DVDs. But since last summer I've had a new rule in place: For every book I buy, I have to get rid of two that I already own.

Too many books. Not in keeping with Franciscan poverty.

Heck, I don't even have a enough room to put them all out on shelves anyway.

So ... I left the bookstore without purchasing anything.

I helped to counter the temptation to buy by thinking of all the books I had at home that I had not finished, or even started. I thought in particular of Blessed Pope John XXIII - maybe inspired by the recent news concerning Pope John Paul II's impending beatification.

Last night I got out our copy of the DVD about Blessed Pope John XXIII (the one starring Ed Asner), and my copy of John XXIII: The Official Biography by Mario Benigni and Goffroedo Zanchi. He was, of course, a lover of knowledge and books himself.

We made it as far as his election as Pope before bed beckoned.

In the book, I picked up where I had left off: When he was a seminarian, ages 17-19.

His prayer life even at that young age tweaked my 55-year-old conscience. His struggles with pride sounded familiar.

I was particularly struck by his battle with trying to draw attention to himself by showing off his knowledge.

"He hints (in Journal of a Soul) that he used words and clever phrases out of a secret desire to flaunt his knowledge and to make known, whether directly or indirectly, that he had studied."

Just like me. How often do I make sure I insert some joke or comment just to make sure the other people know how much I know?

I need to learn to hold my tongue and follow the humble example of Blessed Pope John XXIII - another pope I hope to see declared a Saint in my lifetime.

Pax et bonum

Prayer for Secular Franciscan Vocations

2010-12-23T10:14:00.001-05:00

National Prayer for Vocations to the Secular Franciscan Order

Here is a version of the national prayer from our Fraternity's newsletter.

Perhaps it could be cut and placed somewhere that it could be prayed daily.

Father,
Good and Gracious God,
God of mercy, compassion generosity and love,
as we live our lives in the model of Saint Francis,
choosing daily to live the Gospel life,
Help us to help others hear your call,
Help us to help others to recognize their vocation
as a Secular Franciscan
that You have already planted in their heart,
Help us so that together we all may work
to bring the Gospel to life.
Amen

Pax et bonum

Solanus Casey - a man full of thanks!

2010-11-25T11:38:00.005-05:00

How appropriate that this Thanksgiving Day falls on the 140th birthday of Venerable Solanus Casey, a Capuchin who truly knew how to offer thanks to God for blessings received.

"Let us thank God ahead of time for whatever he forsees is pleasing to Him, leaving everything at His divine disposal, including, with all its circumstances, when, where, and how He may be pleased to dispose the events of our death."

I pray that I can emulate his gentle, peaceful, practical, grateful ways.

Pax et bonum

Peace ... not Anger

2010-11-23T18:28:00.002-05:00

As part of formation, we discussed the topic of peace.

I had a hard time.

I am not a peaceful person. There is a lot of anger in me. I have a bad temper. I fester and seethe at times.

As I read the material, as I thought of the Franciscan focus on peace, as i considered the life of St,. Francis, I couldn't help think of my own lack of peace.

I told my formation director that I was so troubled as I read and reflected that I wondered if I could in good conscience make my final profession before I had dealt with this issue.

He was supportive and comforting, but still, the misgivings linger.

Of course, I may never "resolve" this. It may be a life-long issue with which I'll have to struggle. And as a Secular Franciscan, I would be on a spiritual path that will help me if I am open to God's grace.

Pax et bonum

Confession is good for the soul

2010-10-10T06:52:00.003-04:00

I was beginning to find myself drifting into habits I don't like - and that could lead me astray. So I went to confession.

The priest wisely pointed out that many of my failings are due to choices I make - and that I could make the right choices. I have to get into the habit of making the right choices. Then when the bigger challenges come I'll be stronger, more sensitive, and more self-aware.

Pax et bonum

St. Francis cookies

2010-10-09T08:11:00.003-04:00

Before last night's SFO meeting - at which we were going to have a small celebration of St. Francis's feast - I looked on line for cookies associated with St. Francis.

I learned for several sources that apparently he was fond of almond cookies.

You learn something new every day.

I stopped a store on the way. They did not have "official" almond cookies, but they did have something like them. I bought them. Next year, maybe I'll try my hand at making some real ones.

I also discovered a couple of more recent recipes for "Wolf Paw Cookies," which he would not have known, but which were created in light of the story of Francis and the wolf of Gubbio.

Maybe I'll try those some time too.

A silly post? Perhaps. But Francis did consider himself a Fool for Christ.

Maybe like me he was a Fool with a sweet tooth.

Pax et bonum

How do I spend my time?

2010-09-26T14:29:00.002-04:00

During formation on Friday, we talked about evangelization. A good discussion.

Then up to an activity recommendation that I work out "a possible schedule of how (I) might be able to tithe one-tenth of (my) waking hours in service to the Church and/or in bringing a Christian spirit to society with a conscious effort."

Ten percent of my waking hours? That works out to about 1.6 hours a day (1 hour, 36 minutes).
Just over 11 hours per week.

My formation director was hard pressed himself to come up with how one might do that if one does not include prayer time. Our days are so full of work, family activities, and so on.

I can easily see that some days I hit the mark. I'm in two music groups at Church - each practices 1 1/2- 2 hours every week except summers. On weeks when Rock of Faith is playing, I'm putting in 3-4 hours (not including Mass time). I'm involved with 40 Days for Life, both as part of the starring committee, and in prayer in front of Planned Parenthood. That works out to at least one hour a week from August to the end of October, and two or more hours during the actual campaign.

But even if you include travel time for all these activities, that still does not average out to
more than 11 hours a week.

I pointed out at some of my online activities might qualify. After all, I am a writer, and even worked as a Catholic journalist for many years. When I blog or post on Facebook about Franciscan activities, Church music, spirituality, or social and political issues, I am helping to evangelize. (Of course, time spent on games, fantasy sports, chit-chatting with friends, posting silly poems don't count, etc.!)

Still not enough.

Finally I noted that to meet such a goal, one has to reorient one's life to reduce activities that don't advance the Kingdom. One must make more time activities that serve the church and and advance the Christian spirit.

But isn't that the point of a vocation to the Secular Franciscan life? it's not just a social activity. I am in formation for an order.

So maybe I really do need to spend less time fiddling about online, or watching television, or reading junk. If I am to be a follower of Francis, I must follow him in his dedication to the Lord.

Pax et bonum

Gloomy face, chilling look

2010-09-25T06:36:00.003-04:00

“It is not fitting, when one is in God's service, to have a gloomy face or a chilling look.” - St. Francis of Assisi.

The other day, a parent remarked to the principal at my school that she thought I was mad at her. That came just moments after we'd had a brief conversation, but one which I thought was innocuous - and certainly without confrontation or harsh words.

I was trying to figure out why she would say that when the principal added a comment about smiling.

A subtle suggestion?

I tend toward "serious" looking expressions. People have commented in the past that I sometimes look mad or upset even when I'm not.

They have a point. I need to work at trying to look more friendly, more inviting.

I've got to keep trying to smile more!

Pax et bonum

Evangelization

2010-09-24T22:03:00.002-04:00

Tonight at formation we talked about evangelization and the many ways we can evangelize.

Yes, there is talking - preaching. But we also evangelize through writing (such as through blogs), through our actions, through acts of charity, through volunteering at Church and in the community, through the way we conduct ourselves a work and at home, through our attitides and the way we interact with others.

In short: In all that we do.

We should be witnesses to God's love and forgiveness each and every moment of the day.

As Christians, that is our call. As Secular Franciscans, that is what we should be consciously trying to do.

Be with us Lord. Give us the strength we need!

Pax et bonum

Praying for a better Prayer Life

2010-09-18T14:04:00.002-04:00

At formation, we talked about struggles with prayer.

Finding time. Making time.

Dryness.

Wandering minds.

Just feeling as if one is going through the motions.

The director basically said that the important thing is to persevere even when the "feeling" is not there. The effort itself is of value - and it is building up spiritual muscles even if we are not aware. Plus, it may be the thing that is keeping us form going off the deep end into despair when our souls are plagued by dryness.

Keep on keeping on.

Amen.

Pax et bonum

Me too egotism

2010-09-11T06:22:00.003-04:00

Lately I've caught myself practicing "me too egotism."

I will be listening to someone else relating an experience, and instead of offering sympathy or praise, or even just simply listen, I will find some way to interject a somehow related experience I had. Even into conversations I was not originally part of.

I do it not to show the person he/she is not alone. I do it not to offer comfort. I do it not to draw the other person out more.

I do it to draw attention to myself.

And too often the other person's moment is overshadowed.

I need to be more concerned about the other person's feelings and needs. I need to practice the arts of humility and silence more.

Pax et bonum

Before dawn

2010-09-05T07:18:00.001-04:00

up before dawn
dealing with various aches -
aspirin, prayers

Pax et bonum

Finally Feeling Franciscan Again

2010-09-04T09:15:00.003-04:00

I have not written in more than a month.

It's been a difficult month for a variety of reasons, and I have not felt particularly Franciscan.

My thoughts and words have certainly not always been Franciscan.

My new dog even chewed on my Tau cross!

Yes, I know faith is more than feeling. It involves commitment, decisions, consistency, actions. It requires prayer even when the words feel like sand in your mouth.

I'm back. God help me to stay where I'm supposed to be.

Pax et bonum

A Prayer Meme

2010-08-02T11:30:00.003-04:00

My friend at Do Not Be Anxious tagged me for this Catholic Prayer Meme in this blog. (I was also tagged at my main blog by another blogger, so this post is doing double duty!)

Here are some of the guidelines:

"Name your three most favorite prayers, and explain why they're your favorites. ... Finally, tell the person who tagged you that you've completed the meme... The Liturgy and the Sacraments are off limits here. I'm more interested in people's favorite devotional prayers."

I had to think about that one. I have a lot of favorite prayers. I have prayers i say for specific purposes. I have prayers that meant a great deal to me at one point, but then I moved on or had other needs.

Three that are especially important to me are:

"The Our Father." This prayer is a gift of Jesus; that alone makes it special. It it a prayer of praise, of longing, of supplication, of challenge. It was one of the first prayers that I learned. It's one I recite as part of the Rosary, but also one I often say just to say it!

"The Apostles Creed." I tend to be a bit of a legalist - I was tempted at one time to be a lawyer, and as my students will grouse, I'm a stickler for guidelines and enforce the rules. I like a clear set of beliefs, and this prayer spells out the basic beliefs of my Catholic faith.

"The Jesus Prayer." (Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.) I discovered this prayer years ago. It appealed to me because of its shortness (I like short, as my haiku, clerihews and limericks reveal). It's a prayer I recite often when I need help. When my mind begins to wander along paths it shouldn't 't wander, I recite it to get my mind back in focus (or to break the focus on things I shouldn't be focusing on!). It's also a prayer I recite when I'm trying to deal with something troubling or painful (like when I'm sitting in the dentist's chair!).

There they are, the big three. I'm grateful for the tag, for it got me thinking about prayer, and why these particular ones appeal to me.

Part of this meme calls for me to tag five other bloggers. I prefer to let people decide for themselves if this is something they want to do. If you a reader of this blog, feel free to try it.

Pax et bonum

Knuckleheaded Francis got it right

2010-07-22T15:06:00.003-04:00

I'm reading St. Bonaventure's life of St. Francis.

While reading it hit me: St. Francis was a bit of a knucklehead!

What I mean is that as he began his spiritual journey, he took things so literally, almost like one of the Three Stooges.

For example, when asked to rebuilt the Church, he understood that to mean build a particular church. He did that in instance after instance. God would ask him to do something, and he would interpret the request literally.

The important thing is that he did respond. He did act. Even when he did not do what he was really supposed to do, he still followed the directions to the best of his abilities.

After, all, he was a fool for Christ.

I must seek what God wants form me in my own life, and I can't let fear that I'll get it wrong stop me. I just have to do what I believe God wants me to do, do it to the best of my ability, and do it in a spirit of humility and openness so that if I have not gotten it right God can tap me on the shoulder - in my case, maybe a whack me on the head - with further directions.

I wonder what Francis would have thought of the Three Stooges? He might have welcomed them as brothers.

Pax et bonum

Prayer of St. Bonaventure

2010-07-15T09:12:00.001-04:00

Pierce, O most Sweet Lord Jesus, my inmost soul with the most joyous and healthful wound of Thy love, with true, serene, and most holy apostolic charity, that my soul may ever languish and melt with love and longing for Thee, that it may yearn for Thee and faint for Thy courts, and long to be dissolved and to be with Thee.

Grant that my soul may hunger after Thee, the bread of angels, the refreshment of holy souls, our daily and supersubstantial bread, having all sweetness and savor and every delight of taste; let my heart ever hunger after and feed upon Thee, upon whom the angels desire to look, and may my inmost soul be filled with the sweetness of Thy savor; may it ever thirst after Thee, the fountain of life, the fountain of wisdom and knowledge, the fountain of eternal light, the torrent of pleasure, the richness of the house of God.

May it ever compass Thee, seek Thee, find Thee, run to Thee, attain Thee, meditate upon Thee, speak of Thee, and do all things to the praise and glory of Thy name, with humility and discretion, with love and delight, with ease and affection, and with perseverance unto the end.

May Thou alone be ever my hope, my entire assurance, my riches, my delight, my pleasure, my joy, my rest and tranquility, my peace, my sweetness, my fragrance, my sweet savor, my food, my refreshment, my refuge, my help, my wisdom, my portion, my possession and my treasure, in whom may my mind and my heart be fixed and firmly rooted immovably henceforth and for ever. Amen.

Pax et bonum

Franciscan quotation

2010-07-03T10:23:00.003-04:00

"While you are proclaiming peace with your lips, be careful to have it even more fully in your heart." - St Francis of Assisi

Advice I need to keep reminding myself about.

Lord, give me peace in my heart.

Pax et bonum

A Franciscan surprise (St. Anthony)

2010-06-14T16:16:00.002-04:00

I went to morning Mass today and got a surprise.

Yesterday was the Feast of St. Anthony of Padua, but since the Feast fell on a Sunday it was superseded. So the parish marked his Feast at this morning's Mass instead.

Several ladies dressed in Franciscan robes processed with a decorated statue of St. Anthony - lilies in hand. (Though i don't understand the dollars attached to the statue. An Italian custom?)

Father preached about St. Anthony, telling about him and some of the customs surrounding him'

At the end of Mass, some of the "Franciscan" ladies distributed bread in St. Anthony's honor.
I got two small loaves - one for me and one for the Good Looking One.

Thank you Lord. What a great way to begin summer!

Pax et bonum

Prayers

2010-06-13T08:28:00.002-04:00

My formation session on Friday dealt with prayer.

I had to admit that lately my prayer life has become uneven.

On good days, my daily prayers include Mass, a rosary, some Bible reading, some spiritual reading, Night Prayers, and assorted short spontaneous prayers of praise, joy and supplication.

Sounds good - though there certainly could be and should be more if I am going to grow spiritually.

Alas, there have been too many days - especially of late - that have not been "good days."

Too tired, too stressed, too busy with end-of-the-school year business.

Of course, when I am tired and stressed, that's precisely when I need prayer.

I'm not beating myself up, but I do have to get back up to speed spiritually and have more "good days."

Maybe even some "better days!"

Pax et bonum

Offering it up

2010-05-30T13:20:00.004-04:00

A couple of weeks ago ago, my Brown Scapular broke. A few days later, we stopped at the local Catholic shop and while there I bought a new one. It's slightly larger than the one I'd had before, and shorter, so it rides higher under my shirt.

My wife had it blessed last week, and I put it on.

It itches. A lot.

At first, I considered not wearing it. I kept it on, though.

Then yesterday we were in the gift shop at the Shrine of Our Lady of Martyrs in Auriesville, N.Y. - a shrine dedicated to the North American Martyrs, and Blessed Kateri Tekakwitha.

They had a nice selection of scapulars. I thought about buying one.

But then I thought about some of the disciplines engaged in by holy people of the past - including St. Francis and Blessed Kateri. Among those practices was the wearing of hair shirts.

It occurred to me that in a way, this itchy scapular is like a mini hair shirt!

I've decided to keep wearing it and to offer up the minor irritation.

It's the least I can do considering the suffering Jesus went through for me.

Pax et bonum

Possessed by possessions (Book 'em)

2010-05-22T16:28:00.003-04:00

At my formation session at our last fraternity meeting we talked about poverty. One part of that discussion was about having too much.

When it comes to me, books was one of the things that came up.

I just own too many of them. I once counted and found I had more than 2,000 books - and that was more than a decade ago.

Books are good, but like so many other good things, in excess they can hold us back. They are possessions that can possess us.

At least in my case they can.

Now that doesn't mean I should stop buying books - if they are books that I can really use. But I have books packed in boxes that I haven't looked at since we moved here into this smaller house 16 years ago! (My old house had enough room to have most of them out - I actually had a "library" room.)

So I'm adopting a rough rule of thumb: If I buy a book, I have to get rid of two other books. Maybe I'll give some to other people. Or maybe I'll donate them to the library for their book sales to help them raise money.

And to reduce the clutter in my life.

Pax et bonum

Wearing the Tau

2010-05-22T10:18:00.003-04:00

After posting previously about wearing my Tau necklace in public - a sign of my membership in the Secular Franciscan Order (albeit, just as a candidate at this point) - I have been trying to wear my cross when I can (and when I remember!)

At work, where I can't wear it in the open, I wear it under my shirt or sweater.

Outside of work, I try to keep it out in view.

It's a public witness. So far, though, no one has asked or said anything. I have seen a few eyes stray to the cross, but that's about it. Maybe its mere presence is enough.

But this morning I discovered another purpose.

I stopped at a coffee shop after morning Mass to pick up coffees and treats for my wife and me. I was wearing my cross.

As I turned to leave, I spotted an attractive young women at a table. Being a normal male, I glanced at her.

She looked at me. I got the impression she was looking at my cross. (I'm an overweight middle-aged guy, after all.)

My glance was quick and harmless - not a stare or an ogle - but the thought occurred to me as I walked to my car: I was in my actions a public witness, and in wearing the tau, I was a public representative of the SFOs.

I thought of priests and how careful they have to be in all they do and say in public.

Maybe this will help me to remember that all my actions, gestures, and words send a message to others.

Pax et bonum

Sigh - Satan tosses one my way

2010-05-08T06:12:00.004-04:00

We all face temptations. All of them can harm us, but we are often susceptible to some more than others.

My weak spots involve the flesh.

I had been doing well for a while, but the other night my wife was watching a movie I had never seen. I wandered in to sit and read. I kept glancing up, though.

The movie dealt with various kinds of carnal behavior, sometimes with humor, but also with violence. And then there appeared the requisite gratuitous nudity.

I left the room.

But the next day, some of the images and lines kept popping into my head.

As I was driving. As I trying to say my rosary.

I tried my old standby prayer to battle thoughts: Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.

Repeated over and over.

It would work for that moment, but the images would come back.

I was reminded of the story of two Zen Buddhist monks.

They came to a ford of a stream that was running high, and the current was strong and frightening looking. An attractive young lady was standing at the ford, looking nervous. She clearly was afraid to cross, but had an important reason to go across.

Without a word, the older of the two monks lifted her in his arms and waded across the stream, and placed her safely on the far bank. The younger monk looked shocked at this action, but kept his silence for quite some number of miles as they continued their journey. Finally, he blurted out, "You know that it is against the rules of our order to have any contact with women. How could you do that?"

The older monk replied, "I put her down when I reached the other side of the river. You, on the other hand, have been carrying her this whole way."

I suppose some people can watch such movies - though, to be honest, from what I saw there was little of redeeming value in the film (the Bishops rated it Morally Offensive) - but given my own weaknesses, I can't . I have to be careful what I watch, what I read, and what I listen to.

I am a sinner.

Those stories of St. Francis battling temptation by rolling in snow or even thorn bushes make sense to me!

Pax et bonum.

How about a little Franciscan music?

2010-05-06T19:45:00.001-04:00

Pax et bonum

Public Witness?

2010-05-01T13:45:00.003-04:00

Today the Good Looking One and I were going out to pick up some bird seed and to stop for lunch.

As I got ready, I picked up the Tau Cross I received when I became a Candidate. I debated whether or not to wear it where it could be seen.

Part of the debate is because of a report we had at our last meeting. That report said Secular Franciscans need to "evangelize" more, need to promote the Secular Franciscan Order more. At my locla fraternity we certainly could use more new members: I'm the only Candidate.

There was talk of maybe placing an ad in the Catholic newspaper, or perhaps sending out bulletin announcements. Meanwhile, I'm meeting this afternoon to help launch a blog for our locla fraternity as one way to do this. I've also begun to think of a Facebook account to help get our local fraternity some more public presence.

But then there is the Tau.

Do I wear it in public as a public witness (except at work, where it would not be allowed)? If I'm a member of an order, shouldn't I be like members of other orders - priests, brothers, women religious - who wear distinctive garb or symbols as a public witness to their vocation?

I chose not to wear it. I need to talk to some other members of the fraternity. I also seek others' input.

Pax et bonum

Now I am a Novice

2010-04-24T09:23:00.002-04:00

Last night I was officially accepted as a Candidate (Novice) with the Secular Franciscan Order.

I knew it was coming, but I had not known it would be last night.

I arrived for the meeting of the Glory of the Most High Fraternity when I was told it would take place. I was asked if I wanted to take this next step. I said yes, though in my heart I wondered if I was worthy, if I was living the Franciscan vocation well enough in my daily life, if I was truly being a person of prayer and penance.

We had a brief ceremony, with Scripture readings, and then I was presented with a Tau Cross to wear and a copy of The Rule.

I will be a Candidate for the next 18 to 36 months now, after which I will be able to profess.

It is wonderful - joyful - frightening - because of all that it entails.

This is not just joining a club.

This is not just a social activity.

When I profess, this will be a commitment to a Gospel way of life in a Catholic Order. This is a vocation. This is life-long. In all that I do and say I will be a witness for the Church, for Franciscans.

Father, be with me. Give me the strength I need.

Pax et bonum

Positive Penance

2010-04-10T15:22:00.002-04:00

As part of my formation, I read some selections concerning penance.

My notions about penance tend to focus on two areas.

The first is about making up for sins. Penance is the things we do to atone in some way for those sins - saying prayers, giving up something, doing something of a spiritual nature.

The second is about uniting in love with Christ in his suffering. It is sharing in that suffering in some way - during prayer by meditating on what he experienced.

But the selections touched on an idea that I had really not thought about.

We perform acts of penance to help clear away all those things in our lives that keep us from seeing God and his love clearly. It is working to remove all the obstacles to accepting God's love - the greed, the lust, the gluttony, the pride.

The hatred for the body that Francis spoke of is not a negative rejection of the flesh - it is a recognition that there are some aspects of the flesh that blind us and keep us physically, emotionally and spiritually unhealthy. So, for example, we give up sexual activities not because sex is bad, but because those particular activities separate us from God.

We give up these things so that we are open to the love of God that is always there, always showering us.

Penance then becomes a way to become healthy individuals, individuals who recognize what is true, what is real - the Love of God. Even when we face physical infirmities, the effects of aging, the mental and emotional pressures put upon us by the world, we still have a healthy view of reality. Thus while in the eyes of the world we appear to be suffering when we face such troubles, we are actually fully healthy in spirit.

We are full of joy, for we realize how loved we really are.

Alleluia!

Pax et bonum

Good Friday Meditation

2010-04-03T07:20:00.003-04:00

Thank you Lord

for your two great gifts -

the gift of your birth

and the gift of your death -

for it is through both

that we have been saved.

Pax et bonum

Persecution comes in many forms

2010-03-30T09:41:00.004-04:00

At our SFO meeting last week, I started the Candidacy lessons (though I will not be officially accepted as a novice until, God willing, next meeting). Then I joined the rest of the group to talk about the writings of St. Francis, which they are studying as part of ongoing formation.

They were talking about Chapter XVI of the "Earlier Rule." This chapter concerns "Those who are going among the Saracens and other nonbelievers."

One person pointed out that the chapter deals with those who are placing themselves in situations in which they might become martyrs for the faith. The person lamented that we don't have those opportunities as easily today, and implied that we are somehow "weaker" for not seeking out martyrdom ourselves.

I pointed out that the rule was for the members of the first order, not us SFOs. We Secular Franciscans have vocations as lay people, husbands, parents, and workers in the world, and we are not as free to seek martyrdom deliberately (though we might face it anyway).

I also noted that we face different kinds of martyrdom. Whenever we stand up for the our faith, whenever we defend the Church, whenever will live as Catholics in the world, we proclaim the faith, and we face possible persecution. We might be ridiculed, or subject to constant verbal attacks, close scrutiny, knowing looks, and so on.

I reported that recently, for example, I had been drawn into a debate with others over the papacy, Africa, AIDs, birth control and condoms at a gathering after my father's funeral! (My mind was understandably distracted; I don't think I did as good a job as I should have.)

The portion of the rule we were discussing says one way to witness is "not to engage in arguments or disputes, to be subject to every human creature for God's sake (1 Pet 2:13) and to acknowledge that (we) are Christians." So simply by living according to the faith and not being afraid to admit what we are, we are "preaching" - and we might be persecuted. At the simplest level we might be labeled as a "religious fanatic," and thus in that way dismissed.

I am one of those prone to arguing and disputing, though I lack the knowledge and patience to do so effectively at times. I should not stop doing that when I can do so in an appropriate way, but I also need to remember that I can preach by simply living out my faith. I need to remember that if I have a reputation as a believer, I have to be careful that all of my words and actions are in keeping with the teachings of the faith and the example of St. Francis.

Pax et bonum

Failing as a follower

2010-03-27T06:17:00.002-04:00

At school yesterday I got angry. That happens. That's human.

But I acted on it.

A troublesome student pushed all the right buttons, and I responded harshly, saying things to her that I know I should not. I reacted in anger.

There is too much anger in me. I have not given it over to God. I have not asked for the healing I need.

The fact that my spiritual life has been out of whack for more than a month now does not help. Had I been praying, had I been more consistent, maybe I wouldn't have spoken the way I did. I would have been more open to God's help and strength.

But I haven't been. I wasn't open. I failed.

Pax et bonum