I have three daughters. They've all grown up and moved from home.
They are good, caring young women. They all have jobs - something to be thankful for these days.
But not one of them has remained Catholic. None of them goes to church - any church. They hold views on some issues that go against Catholic teachings.
Only one is married, and she's getting divorced. There are no grandchildren - and there doesn't seem any chances of even one in the near future.
I know that they are adults and so how they live is between them and God. I can't make them believe or go to church.
And I know that they are young and that like many other young people they may eventually return to faith.
But there's still a part of me that looks at my own personal and faith failings and how they affected them. I was not always the best Catholic - I even left the Church for a while. I have not always acted in the most Christian ways. My marriage to their mother failed for a number of reasons, some of them my fault.
Had I been a better role model, had I been a better father and husband, had I acted more proactively, maybe their paths would be different. Maybe.
Or maybe not.
But still, I have to take responsibility for not doing a better job as a father and a spiritual shepherd.
God forgive me.
Pax et bonum
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1 comment:
I could cut and paste much of your story and put it on my blog. I understand.
But, coincidently having gone to confession this morning, you need to understand. You are forgiven. As I was so strongly reminded this morning during my meditation time, God and me are like the Father and the Prodigal son; things there are as good as I let them be. And forgiveness is always there. And the past is the past. What I worry on is not the past but the future, and my relationship with the Father will always be good, it's my relationship with others that I worry about. And it's how I really act as if "it is not I, but Christ within me" who acts.
How you live your life NOW is what counts. For both those you choose to influence, and those who you do not even know you are influencing. My greatest fears are that I fail those who God has brought into my life, and especially those who he counts on me to influence in some positive way, but I am not even aware of His plans.
I sooo readily think that all things are my responsibility. They are not. He is here with me, too. Together, we can make all things good. Together.
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