Saturday, February 2, 2013
An odd thought (What's stigmata with you?)
A couple of months ago, my right foot began to bother me. It hurt when I walked, or when it was in any one position for long (such as when driving).
I thought at first I may have bruised it - maybe even to the bone - somehow. When the pain lingered, I began to wonder if maybe I had broken a bone, or perhaps it was an early sign of arthritis. I finally went to an urgent care center. The doctor examined the foot, and even took x-rays. Nothing. He gave me some medicine to see if perhaps it was just a matter of a muscle strain. The medicine didn't help.
The foot still hurts. A dull but persistent pain. I'm thinking of going to a specialist at some point.
Two weeks ago the left side of my chest began to hurt just over my heart. I thought maybe it was because I have been coughing so much that maybe I pulled a muscle, or perhaps even cracked a rib.
It hurts when I cough, turn suddenly, turn over on that side in bed, or sometimes even when I take a deep breath. The pain is not debilitating, just sometimes sharp. I'm waiting to see if it continues much longer. If it does, then maybe I'll think about seeing a doctor. Maybe.
Yeah, I know. It's a guy thing.
This morning an odd thought hit me. My wife has been watching a movie about St. Padre Pio. And last night we talked about offering up suffering at my Franciscan meeting.
Both St. Padre Pio and St. Francis had the stigmata.
And my foot - in a spot where my Lord was pierced by a nail - and my side - in a place where a spear was thrust into my Lord - were hurting.
It was almost as if I was experiencing a small taste of the stigmata.
Not that I believe I'm really having any such mystical experience. I am not spiritually deep enough, I am not prayerful enough, I am not so lost in love for the Lord for any such miracle to happen to me. And the pain that I'm experiencing is no where near the agony my Lord experienced, or even like that felt by holy stagmatists like Saints Pio or Francis.
But it occurred to me that I can still offer these pains up.
Of course, if my other foot and my hands start to hurt I'll begin to wonder if God is playing a little joke on me!
Pax et bonum